"AITA for asking my friend to wear pink?"
Me (22F) am engaged. I'm going to be married to my beautiful fiancé (20M) in 2 months. We have practically got everything ready. My dress is ordered, his tux is ordered, food, catering etc. It's all ready to go...expect one bridesmaid's outfit, my longtime friend (25F). The color theme for my wedding is pink and gold, a mix of me and my fiancé favorite colors.
The bridesmaid dresses are pink, a pastel pink. I let my bridesmaids choose the shape of the dress for the wedding as I want them to be comfortable. One of my bridesmaids is wearing a tux as they are more masc presenting.
The issue is, my friend who I'll call Alice has suddenly decided she doesn't wanna wear pink nor a dress even tho this was decided months ago. I had even paid for half of all the bridesmaids dresses and had paid half for hers. Two weeks ago she as I said, decided she wasn't gonna wear it, and that it had to be a black tux.
I said that I wasn't gonna pay for another outfit and that if she wanted a black tuxedo even though I wasn't happy about it as it wouldn't fit the color theme she would have to pay for it herself. I told all my bridesmaids that I'm happy with them wearing what they want as long as it's pink. She doesn't care tho, and is expecting me to pay for a half of a black tuxedo.
I explained that I won't be doing that and that I already paid half for the dress she picked out. She's gone and had a massive fit too all my bridesmaids who say I should just cave and get the tux because my wedding is 2 months away. AITA? Note: my friend prefers black and is more masculine, but they chose a dress, I would of been perfectly fine with them choosing a tuxedo as long as it was pink.
Here's what people had to say to OP:
Entire-Rope1103 said:
NTA. Tell her if she wants to wear the black tux she’s more than welcome to as a guest, not a bridesmaid. You didn’t pay for any other guest outfits so why pay for hers. Your wedding is the one time everything should be about you (and fiancé) and what you (and fiancé) want. If she doesn’t wanna respect your wishes, that’s on her.
GreekAmericanDom said:
NTA. Given that you have no issue with them wearing a tux, there is nothing wrong with enforcing the weddings theme colors with your bridesmaids outfits.
unkmaster90001 said:
NTA- she is being selfish expecting you to budge with your colors AND to pay for it.
0reocheesecakey said:
NTA. You already let your bridesmaids pick their style and even paid half for the dress she originally chose. The wedding has a pink and gold theme. Wanting her outfit to fit the theme is completely reasonable. She can wear a tux if she wants but if she insists on black she should pay for it herself. Expecting you to cover that is not okay.
LiveKindly01 said:
NTA. You've already put out money for the dress. You can ask her if she thinks it's fair that you are now out money because SHE changed her mind? (I assume she knew you were putting down a down payment for her dress).
As others have said, she's wearing the dress, or is welcome to wear a tux as a guest and someone else (if you wish) can step in as bridesmaid and wear the dress, if that matters to you. It sucks that people get weird at weddings, it's hard enough to plan without people changing stuff.
Bla_Bla_Blanket said:
NTA - your friend is rude and entitled. Not even trying to chip in for the last minute request is mind-boggling.