'AITA for being upset that my friend didn’t pay me for dinner?'

"AITA for being upset that my friend didn’t pay me for dinner?"

Hi everyone. I’m a 25F and this happened last weekend and it’s still bothering me, so I wanted an outside opinion. I went out to dinner with a close friend of mine (also 25F).

We’ve been friends for a few years and usually things are pretty balanced between us. Sometimes one of us pays and the other Venmos later, or we split the bill. Nothing formal, but it’s never been an issue before.

This time, we went to a nicer restaurant that she suggested. When the check came, she said she had forgotten her wallet and asked if I could cover it and she would send me the money later. I was a little annoyed but said okay because things happen. The bill was around $95 total.

The next day, nothing. A few days passed, still nothing. I didn’t want to be awkward, but after almost a week I texted her something like “Hey, just checking in about dinner from the other night.” She replied with “Oh yeah, I’ll get you soon!” and that was it.

Now it’s been almost two weeks. She’s been posting on social media, going out, ordering drinks, shopping, so it’s not like she’s completely broke. I feel weird bringing it up again because I don’t want to seem petty over money, but $95 is not nothing to me.

I’m on a tight budget and this was supposed to be a split meal, not me treating her. I mentioned this to another friend and they said I should just let it go and that “money ruins friendships.” But I feel like it’s more about respect than the money itself.

Here's what people had to say to OP:

EntertainmentAny2212 said:

Money ruins friendships when you don't pay back money you borrowed after saying you will.

LostMichiganian said:

NTA. If I were you I would just Venmo request the money from her.

Caspian4136 said:

NTA. Seems to me what she did was very deliberate. She suggests a higher end place, then she "forgot her wallet" at home? Sure. That's the oldest excuse in the book when someone wants to mooch off others.

Ask her again for the money, saying you really need it (even if you don't). If she still blows you off, I'd say it's a friendship you can let fall to the wayside. As for your other friend telling you to let it go because money "ruins" friendships, tell them yes, it does ruin friendships when the other person doesn't pay you back and is clearly using you.

Tough_Tumbleweed_504 said:

NTA, Venmo request them and send text saying “Hey, when you get a chance today please send me x$ from the dinner two weeks ago. Thanks!” It’s not wrong to ask for money owed. Sometimes people forget to pay back, sure that’s fine, but if they’re an actual friend and actually meant to pay you, they won’t be annoyed you are reminding them, they will be thankful.

mama_d63 said:

Money doesn't ruin friendships. Deadbeat friends ruin friendships. When someone shows you who they really are, believe them. Write off the money, and the so-called one-sided friendship. NTA.

zealot_ratio said:

NTA. If you hadn't had a firm commitment, I would say let it go and chalk it up to the friendship. But she's stringing you along hoping it goes away. That's a red flag in general.

effectsinsects said:

NTA but you need to accept you will not get the money back. Responsible people don’t “forget” their wallets