'AITA for giving my unemployed brother and his kids 30 days to move out of my inherited house?'
AITA for giving my unemployed brother and his kids 30 days to move out of my inherited house?
I (29) came into an inheritance from my grandma last year. My brother (32) has been having financial trouble since his divorce, so I allowed him and his children (7, 5) to stay temporarily until he could "get back on his feet." That was 10 months ago.
He doesn't even pay rent or utilities, he just purchases groceries occasionally. I've been patient but I'm just at my breaking point now. He's not looking for a job and spends all his time playing video games when I'm working. His kids are nice but have ruined pieces of my grandma's antique furniture that were important for sentimental reasons.
Last week we learned he's been receiving $2K a month from our parents under the guise of saving for his own home, which he's been using for other expenses (discovered he went out and bought a $1200 gaming setup).
I explained to him that he has 30 days' notice that he needs to leave. He went crazy telling me that I'm heartless and leaving his kids homeless. Our parents called me saying I owed him an extra chance because "family takes care of family." They even volunteered to pay for him to stay for a while, but I wasn't interested. I do not need money - I need my home back.
My mom now claims I'm heartless for not being willing to give him more time given that there are kids involved. I feel like I've been exploited for nearly a year, though. AITA for holding firm at 30 days?
Here's what people had to say to OP about this one:
skalliwag___ said:
NTA. Your brother is a lazy leach. The sooner he’s out, the sooner you can get back to looking after your own mental health. He’s not showing any gratitude for what you’ve already done for him. He’s using you and believes the world owes him a free ride.
Useful_Context_2602 said:
NTA. Why can't your parents take him in? Either way he's pocketed $20k and done nothing to improve his living situation.
Gloomy-Increase-8726 said:
NTA. You‘ve definitely been exploited. Give him a formal written notice to vacate. it sounds like your parents are interested in housing him at their place since "family takes care of family." Alternatively, they can pay for his lazy ass to live somewhere else. This should not be your problem.
FlashyHabit3030 said:
100% NTA but your brother sure is. Tell your mom to use pay towards a deposit and apartment for her son. Tell your brother to use $1200 towards a deposit on an apartment. Tell brother he is failing his children, not you. Your brother is using you and you BOTH know it. And, if family helps family then tell your mom to take her grown a son in. Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries.
Mental-Ad-1043 said:
It seems that 97% of these AITAH now follow exactly the same template ….. something that quite clearly is one sided and most definitely where the OP is not the AH. 2 or 3 cherry on top factors that cement that in. And then always the parents and/or family saying that the party that are clearly is in the wrong are being harshly treated. Might just be me.
DetroitSmash-8701 said:
NTA. He's had 10 months worth of chances and didn't do shit with them. What's one more chance going to do? He can stay with them.