"AITA for my 'Irish goodbye' at Thanksgiving?"
Me (19)f and my bf (24)m drove up 3 hours to visit my family for Thanksgiving, he lives across the US and unfortunately couldn’t see his family for the holidays. I was excited to introduce him to everyone but no one seemed interested in talking to him and totally left him out all the festivities.
It left me and him feeling a little disrespected. I mean nothing beyond giving him a handshake and asking for his name, and obviously ignoring him when he tried to talk, and even trying to sit him with the kids!
On top of inappropriate comments about me and my sister's appearance from family my grandma's new husband asked us to come out and help string up Christmas lights, they asked some of the boys to come out and help and I joined them because I didn’t want to leave my boyfriend alone.
After we were finished, I asked if they were going to put up the lawn decor as well, to which he responded with saying I should put it up myself because I was lazy and wasn’t much help. I am a very sensitive girl and started crying. Everyone ignored it for a little until he (grandma's new husband) made a comment about how sensitive I was.
My boyfriend and I slipped out secretly and left after that feeling disrespected and pretty upset about the whole ordeal. No one even noticed until over halfway home. I received texts from my mother and grandma furious that I had just left, and they were both frustrated over how I handled it and believed it was rude of me and boyfriend to leave.
On top of that, they said it was immature of me to cry over a comment like that and I should just get over it because of all my family, specifically my grandma has done for me. I think neither one of us were shown any morsel of respect, and people were just outright rude to me and him. AITA?
Here's what people had to say to OP:
Vegetable_Rise7318 said:
NTA - I'm hugely socially awkward, so (paradoxically?) if a new person enters a group I always feel for them and make sure they are welcomed. That said, I'm always amazed at people's propensity to just ignore a newcomer. If they didn't take the time to welcome someone at such an event, just turn and leave when the time comes, that's fair.
esmerelofchaos said:
NTA. One of my (adult) kids brought her boyfriend today and we made sure he got introduced to everyone. That’s how you welcome people for a holiday.
CelticMage15 said:
NTA. Set your boundaries now. If they can’t be nice to you, then stay away from them.
No-UmpireHere said:
NTA! You just should have left after grandpa made you cry.
kimba-the-tabby-lion said:
NTA. It took them 1 1/2 hours to notice you were gone?? The really do not care about you. I am so sorry!