'AITA for refusing to change my wedding date?' 'My brother's wife is due around the same time.'
"AITA for refusing to change my wedding date even though my brother’s wife is due around the same time?"
So, my fiancée, Sarah (30F), and I (32M) have been planning our wedding for over a year. We’re getting married in late October, which has always been a special month for us. It’s the month we met and where we’ve shared a lot of memories together. We both agreed we wanted an autumn wedding, and the venue we fell in love with had exactly one Saturday available in October—so we booked it.
Fast forward to a couple of weeks ago, my younger brother, Jake (28M), and his wife, Lisa (26F), announced they’re expecting their first child, which is great news. The only issue is that Lisa’s due date is, you guessed it, in late October, just a few days before our wedding.
Jake called me up and asked me if we could consider changing our wedding date. He said they’re concerned that the baby might come early or late, and they want to be able to attend the wedding without any stress. He also mentioned that if the baby is born close to the date, he might not be able to make it at all.
I told him I understood, but we’ve already booked everything—the venue, the photographer, the caterer—and moving the date would not only be difficult but would also cost us a significant amount of money. Plus, October is important to us, and we’ve been looking forward to this for over a year.
Jake got upset and said I was being selfish for not considering his situation. He feels like I’m prioritizing my wedding over his child being born. I told him that while I’m excited to be an uncle, this is our wedding, and we shouldn’t have to rearrange it because of something that’s out of our control. Babies come when they come, right?
Now, my parents have gotten involved. They think I’m being unreasonable and should at least try to be flexible, but Sarah is fully on my side and thinks it’s ridiculous to change everything just because of a "what if. So, AITA for sticking to our original wedding date, even if it means my brother might miss it?
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
Cocklecove said:
NTA. Why is it that every time it is the person whose wedding it is and someone wants to change it that the parents are always on the side of the people who want to change the bridal couple to change the wedding date. it is without fail that way. The bridal couple is always being selfish, and there is never any regard to how much money is at stake to reschedule. It's so ridiculous.
madinloveladyyy said:
NTA. Your brother is being a little bit selfish here. It's your wedding day, and you have every right to celebrate it on the date that is meaningful to you. Plus, changing the date now would be a huge inconvenience and expense. Maybe suggest to your brother that he could attend a FaceTime call for the ceremony if the baby does come early. Congrats on your upcoming wedding!
Creepy-Hair9753 said:
NTA, and honestly I would think hard about rescinding my parent’s invitation if they are saying I’m being selfish.
Sad_Economics_106 said:
NTA, so what if their baby is due around your wedding time. Ask Jake if they can put off having their baby until after you get married..lol exactly that's just the same as asking you to hold off on your wedding...
Can't predict the future and yes babies come when their ready and you've already booked it a year in advance and once you lose your place in line it takes forever, if at all to, get it back. NTA at all. Good luck to you!
Witty_Collection9134 said:
I want to know why they took the risk of a baby being due when they knew the wedding date. NTA.
ExtensionDebate8725 said:
NTA. Tell them you'll postpone it if they pay for EVERYTHING.