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'AITA for telling my future SIL to pay for a new wedding dress after she altered mine?'

'AITA for telling my future SIL to pay for a new wedding dress after she altered mine?'


"AITA for telling my future SIL to pay for a new wedding dress after she altered mine?"

I (24F) am engaged to my fiance, "Adrien" (25M). I just managed to luck out and purchase a vintage wedding dress for about $1,200 from a lovely older woman who was selling it on Ebay.

I have a FSIL, "Silena" (22f) who I let store the dress in her own home while Adrien and I deep-cleaned our closet so it didn't get damaged and wasn't hanging around for anyone besides immediate family or close friends to see.

Yesterday, Adrien and I went to go pick up the dress since we were done cleaning out our closet. I was so excited to have it back and was planning on showing it to my mother.

To my shock and horror, Silena had, in her own words, modernized the dress while it was at her place. She had gutted it. It was now essentially a mini dress with barely any resemble to what it previously.

I freaked out at her, saying she had no right to do that to my wedding dress, and that she had ruined it. Silena complained, saying that it was a surprise and supposed to be a pre wedding/engagement gift.

Silena tried to get Adrien to defend her, but he sided with me and said she completely and utterly overstepped, which surprised me because he's pretty protective over her. We left without the dress, and Silena muttering about how she did me a favor.

It was later that night when I got the idea to make her pay for another wedding dress. There was another dress that I had been eyeing that cost a bit less, but I chose the other dress over it.

I talked about it with my fiance, and he agreed that Silena should pay for the dress since he ruined the first one. I sent the link to the dress to Silena over text and I asked her to pay for it.

Silena texted back, saying that she wouldn't pay for the replacement dress, and that I should be fine with wearing the first one or paying for the replacement dress myself. We argued over text for awhile before Silena just stopped responding and left me on read.

This morning, I checked my phone and saw an voice-mail from my FMIL saying that Silena shouldn't have to pay for the replacement and that alterations she made were a sweet gift.

I asked Adrien about it, and he said that I should stick to my plans of making Silena pay for it, but now that my FMIL is involved, I'm reconsidering it. AITA?

Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:

Traditional-Baker756 said:

What the heck!!!! Who alters someone’s wedding dress without being asked to! She should definitely pay for a new dress. If FMIL thinks it was a good idea, she should buy you a new dress.

PinoyBrad said:

Small claims and no wedding invite for the FSIL. If FMIL doesn’t like tough titties and you could just not invite her too for less drama.

murphy2345678 said:

Take her to small claims court. Don’t discuss it anymore. She isn’t going to pay willingly. Anyone who sides with her isn’t invited to the wedding. NTA.

CrystalQueen3000 said:

NTA. FSIL had zero right to make any alterations and needs to pay for a new dress. Does FMIL have a substance abuse issue? That’s the only reason I can think of that she’d be siding with her daughter on this one.

Express_Use_9342 said:

NTA Your fiancé should handle this and yes FSIL should pay for ruining your wedding dress.

LegitimateDifficulty said:

NTA! Who does something like this? I would ask both FMIL and FSIL how they would feel if this happened to them? What would they want to have happen? Is there a FIL? If so, your fiancée should have a chat with him.

What's your advice for this bride?

Sources: Reddit
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