'AITA for getting a hotel after spending one night at a friend’s house?'

"AITA for getting a hotel after spending one night at a friend’s house?"

Back in March, my two friends (a married couple) invited me, my best friend, and another mutual friend to stay at their house for an event they were hosting this October. Me and my best friend wanted to get a hotel because we thought it would be more comfortable, but the hosts insisted that we stay at their home. They said they would have plenty of space and really wanted us to stay with them.

We went back and forth about it for a while, but eventually we agreed to stay at their house. My best friend and I drove 14 hours to their house only to find out the sleeping accommodations were an air mattress (that felt like you were sleeping on wood) and a futon laying on top of a metal slat bed frame with no support.

I slept on the futon with the mutual friend and my best friend slept on the air mattress. We all slept horribly and were in so much pain in the morning. That night, my best friend and I ended up booking a hotel and told the hosts we were staying there for the rest of the trip.

The hosts were expectedly disappointed, but we were pretty upset that they insisted we stay with them when we made it clear we value comfort and were prepared to book a hotel in advance. AITA for not sticking it out for the remainder of the trip at their house?

Here's what people had to say to OP:

viciousfunny said:

NTA I tell everyone I'm in the memory foam stage of my life now. My days of sleeping on a half inflated air mattress under a dining room table are over.

KarinSpaink said:

NTA. Insisting that you stay at their place while not providing adequate sleeping accommodation is not being hospitable.

LadderExtension6777 said:

NTA…you went a fair distance for their event and stayed one night and paid for your hotel. They may feel some kind of way but you prefer a bed, like most people. I don’t even stay at people’s houses anymore when visiting from out of town and book a place and say I don’t want to impose, I’m a light sleeper, I have stomach issues (all true) and they understand. Don’t stress about it too much.

quincebush said:

Oh heck no, NTA, I can not imagine how uncomfortable you were after a 14 hour drive only to find your hosts didn't have proper beds for the guests they insisted stay with them. We all reach an age where we're done camping out at a friend's house.

I_DRINK_ANARCHY said:

NTA. I always invite people to stay in my home if they're in town, but I have a VERY comfy, decent sized bed in my guest room. And if we're having a party and a lot of people are staying over, our futon is also comfy for most people (I've slept on it plenty of times myself), our couches all recline, our air mattress is about a foot thick, and we have a ton of blankets and pillows for everyone.

But I have plenty of friends who either prefer a hotel or going home to their own bed and I would never presume to try and change their minds, nor take it personally if that was their decision.

Wise-Matter9248 said:

NTA. Sleep is important for a good visit. Unless you spend a lot of time at the hotel (and didn't give the mutual friend the option to join you), there's no reason that you shouldn't have the hotel to sleep at.

Their disappointment is reasonable, so is your frustration. It's exciting to be able to host a friend. It's also frustrating to be guilted into something you don't really want.

EmeraldLovergreen said:

NTA. I would have done the same. Any time we visit anyone, we stay in a hotel. For one thing we like having a quiet space to return to. My MIL tries to get all five of her kids and their families to stay in her 3 bd, 1 bath house. One time she offered me and my husband couches. Not pull outs. Just couches.