'I got my manager demoted by bringing gourmet lunches to work. AITA?'
"I got my manager demoted by bringing gourmet lunches to work. AITA?"
I've been at my job for about six months and my manager has been on my case since day one. Lets call him Dan. Everything I do gets nitpicked. My work is fine according to everyone else but Dan always finds something. When I ask him to be specific about what I should change he just says things like be better or figure it out.
A few weeks ago Dan stops by my desk and tells me I need to stop bringing such sad lunches to work. Says it reflects poorly on me and makes it look like I dont have my life together.
For context I usually bring pretty normal stuff. Sandwich, leftovers, salad, whatever. Nothing weird. Meanwhile half the office eats fast food or just grabs chips from the vending machine. But sure, my turkey sandwich is the problem.
I asked him what specifically he wanted me to bring. He said I should just put more effort in and that eating better would help my performance. Made zero sense, but okay. So I decided to be petty.
The next day I brought a full charcuterie board. Nice cheeses, fancy crackers, prosciutto, little cornichons, the whole thing. Laid it all out at my desk during lunch. People started coming by asking what the occasion was. I told them Dan said my lunches were too sad so I upgraded.
The day after that I brought homemade beef bourguignon in a nice glass container with cloth napkin and real silverware from home. Day after that was a caprese salad with fresh mozzarella and basil I grew myself.
People kept asking why I was eating like a french aristocrat at my desk. I kept telling them Dan wanted me to put more effort into my lunches. Only when they asked though. I wasnt going around announcing it.
By the end of the week the CEO came to my desk. She said shed been hearing some interesting things and wanted to know what was going on. I explained the whole situation including the months of vague criticism I couldn't get clarity on.
Turns out other people had complained about Dan before but nothing stuck. My little lunch protest was the thing that finally made her look into it. Dan got moved to a different department with no direct reports. I report to someone else now who actually gives useful feedback.
I feel a little bad because I didnt mean to get him demoted. I was just being petty. But also he told me my sandwiches were sad and now he's not my problem anymore. AITA for taking it this far?
Here’s what people had to say to OP:
He criticized your lunch in an office where people eat vending machine chips. The audacity got him exactly what he deserved.
I've met people like that before. They straight up think that bringing food from home makes people look poor. And insist that buying something, anything, is much better. Then you combine that with classic middle-manager syndrome and you get AHs like this. Who will talk about how bringing in food reflects bad on them and the entire department.
NTA you served him his just deserts 😉
What did he eat for lunch?
Crow, now. He eats crow.
NTA, hell, I’m just glad it worked out. He’s off in a corner with no one to pick on and you had some top shelf meals for a bit. I applaud you putting in the effort to be that petty.
You NTA. Dan though, absolutely one. His commentary about your food choices as someone with authority over was an abuse of his authority. His vague non constructive feedback was to assert his power over you/make himself feel powerful in a manner not consistent with his job description so that’s abuse too.
Glad the CEO did something but in reality dude should have been fired, he failed to do his job and acted outside of it abusively and his behavior will continue is one way or another. Grown men that pull that crap have stuff wrong in the head that won’t just go away because he doesn’t have direct people to target with it.
NTA - he was being unprofessional and inappropriate abd it's time people like him in corporate get what they deserve. I absolutely hate abuse of power and love to see justice being served.
Ahh, but people like Dan, & we’ve all seen and worked with them, kiss ass and get promoted to places they have no business being in, where they give their superiors the answer they want to hear while being completely useless to their reports. With no real way of being constructive because they have no idea how to manage people.
NTA. Now it’s fitting that Dan eats sad sandwiches for lunch after his demotion.
My sister had a supervisor who for some unknown reason took against her. They worked in a large, slightly upmarket department store . The supervisor told my sister that her "walk" did not fit the company ethos!!
✨NTA✨Don’t feel bad at all you were asked a question and higher ups knew that Dan has been a problem so he fully deserved to be moved to a different department. They probably moved him in a spot where his time wasting rude BS wouldn’t fly over there and if he tried that again he’d be terminated.
Companies want to know what’s happening so productivity doesn’t cease. I hope Dan has a new coworker who gives him the same behavior he gave you and possibly others.
Not at all he put himself in the position he's in himself by being a Karen. Who is worried about what someone else is eating for lunch anyway? Like I said, he's a Karen. Revenge is a dish best served cold. I'm proud of you.