'AITA for breaking up with my GF for hooking up with someone on her 'freebie' list?'

"AITA For breaking up with my (27M) girlfriend (24F) for making out with someone on her “freebie” list?"

So this isn’t technically recently (3 years ago) but I still wonder if I was in the wrong here. My GF and I had been together for just over a year and of course one of the conversations we had one day in our relationship was who was on our “Freebie” list of celebrities we could hook up with should the opportunity arise.

Her list included mostly athletes from our hometown and that seemed like odd choices to me since mine were all actresses and singers but I thought nothing of it. These guys were definitely traditionally attractive and muscular so I could see why she would choose them and didn’t really think anything of it.

Fast forward and she went out downtown with some friends for a friends birthday and they ended up in a popular club for some dancing and drinking.

One of her friends works for the team (not like directly coaching/training staff but more of an operations assistant for day to day activities but she has definitely met and interacted with the players on some occasions) and my gf ended up making out with one of the guys on her list.

The real problem I had with this is I learned from one of her friends who was there that this had all happened that night. When confronted she said yes it did happen but then insisted that because it was with someone on her previously disclosed list that it didn’t count.

I didn’t know what to say but I just ended it there. I felt betrayed and hurt that she would actually be unfaithful to me just to make out with a celebrity who didnt actually give a shit about her and had probably forgotten her name by the time he woke up the next morning.

I had been cheated on before in a relationship years prior and it shattered my trust but I never thought I’d have to deal with cheating from my otherwise loving and supportive girlfriend.

She tried to say it would have been okay if I had done the same thing but to me even if the chance had occurred I’d never take it. She even said if I had slept with one of my celebrities she wouldn’t be mad and even said “if you had a chance with Emilia Clark I’d jump in bed with you two” as if that made it okay and justified.

She also said it was just making out and touching so it wasn’t even that bad.

I look back at it and think maybe I overreacted and maybe I’d have acted the same if the situation actually happened upon me but I guess I’ll probably never know.

This is what people had to say to OP:

schec1 said:

When her list was “mostly athletes from our hometown”, she planned on checking names off that list.

degausser187 said:

A "Freebie" list does NOT include people you know or could ACTUALLY have a chance with. It's supposed to be a joke because you'd never actually... like, I had Betty White on mine, or Scarlet Johansson. Never gonna happen...

dorothyzbornak71 said:

My freebie would be richard gere.. my husbands is salma hayak. Now we say this but if we literally came across them we wouldn't actually do it. Its all talk...

Qucacarec said:

I went through something similar years ago and honestly the freebie list only works when everyone treats it as pure fantasy. The second someone decides it’s a loophole to try things in real life, the whole foundation cracks.

I remember feeling the same confusion you’re describing, wondering if I’d overreacted, but with distance it was pretty clear the issue wasn’t the kiss itself, it was the total disregard for boundaries you thought were mutual. Once trust feels optional to the other person, there’s not much to rebuild anyway.

Willing-Anteater-251 said:

So was this a real celebrity? Or some guy who peaked in HS?

OP responded:

Definitely a celebrity on a major sports team in our city. If you lived her in 2022 and followed the team you’d know his name

Rough_Rush7914 said:

YTA to yourself by letting her do the faux celebrity list. She played you like a fiddle. I wouldn’t trust her either.