'AITA for ghosting my MOH after she forced me to patch socks at my bachelorette party?'
"AITA for ghosting my MOH after she forced me to patch socks at my bachelorette party?"
Me (F32) and my MOH (F32) have known each other since we were kids. Our relationship was always bumpy but we revived our friendship in our 20s and I’ve decided to ask her to be my MOH.
During the BP, there were some minor red flags, like she buying her favourite drinks and choosing her favourite colours to decorate instead of mine. She also excluded any funny decorations I prepared that were…male organs (🍆) because “her girlfriend doesn’t like that”, which was weird because we’re both bisexual and this was her very first lesbian relationship after more than 15 years of dating exclusively guys.
But I decided to brush it all off and enjoy the party. But oh boi…was I not enjoying it. Then she decided to make her own “games” which mainly included checking if I was ready to be a “perfect wife”:
🍺 pouring beer into the glass for my husband without making a foam,
🤫 staying silent for one minute
🧦 and…patching socks.
The socks were my last straw and I told her I was not having fun and I felt humiliated. She got annoyed and told me to “stop ruining everyone’s fun and just patch the socks” since it’s only a silly game. I refused and my other friend decided to do it so the MOH would get off my back.
During the next couple of days she also texted my hairstylist and makeup artist to change the time of my appointments, cause she suddenly wanted to have it done professionally too.
After casually letting me know about the changes, I got very mad but she just brushed it off, and said I can’t be mean to her only because I’m stressed before the wedding -I wasn’t, in fact only SHE was causing me stress.
She also wanted to come to my house before the ceremony for some strawberries and champagne, which was a nice thought, but she didn’t want my fiancé there.
She asked me “jokingly” why he has to be there and that when she’ll be getting married to her girlfriend, she’ll kick her out of the house so she can prepare by herself and that I should be more independent.
During the wedding everything went smoothly and she barely talked to me, mostly just kept to her girlfriend. After some thinking I decided to block her and just cut her out of my life.
I didn’t want another blame shifting convo since I believe it’s pointless talking to her, and while some of my friends and family agree, some think I’m the AH and should’ve talked to her before blocking her. So, AITA for not talking to her before blocking?
Here’s what people had to say to OP:
You’ve got to be kidding.
NTA. She was and is living vicariously through you. She is basically trying to sabotage you and your marriage and it also seems like she has a thing for you or your significant other cause it really seems like she wants to be in the spotlight either as you or next to you.
As a bisexual girl myself be cautious around her and your mutual friends cause who is to say she didn't already spin the wheel on you since you went NC with her. I wish you and your husband the best in life.
rellik_bibi (OP)
To be honest, she tried! She already contacted my husband, some of my husband’s family (once while being drunk) and my mom, fishing for info. But as long as I’m aware she stopped, thankfully. Also thank you so much for a good word 💕
NTA. Since when are bachelorette parties this whole humiliation ritual? If the bride ain't having fun then the activity/ party stops. She is a very insecure human and she can eat a whole bag of d( which I'm sure she would just love now that she's in a romantic relationship with a woman).
You choosing to block her without any word further about it is totally fine. Sounds like you outgrew the friendship a while ago and were just holding onto remnants out of misplaced loyalty. I've been there done that.