'AITA for giving my SIL the same treatment at her wedding that she gave me at my wedding?'

"AITA to give my sister in law the same treatment she gave me at my wedding on her wedding?"

I met “Michael” 7 years ago. When we were dating, he told that he was always giving mommy and he’s half sister gifts, money, and anything else they wanted. I understand him helping his mom but not half sister. “Karen” let’s call her like that, in our first year of relationship, she asked him for a nose job for Xmas gift.

Who asks this? I was in shock and I told him that this was so abusive and that he did have zero obligation with half sister that he have a strange relationship. They don’t get along but mother, makes sister always the victim because Michael’s father family is rich and her father was broke.

Karen thinks that everyone owns her something. Karen has a good job and she dates a lame guy just because she’s afraid to be alone. They all live for free at his father’s rental home. After 10 year together, the guy,for pure pressure, finally proposed to her.

When we got engaged, I saw all the jealousy and anger coming from Karen when she saw the ring. I heard from other people that she said a lot of mean things about me and she started to talk sh*t about me to my now husband Michael telling him not to marry me. When i discovered this, I lost it and i said everything to her face what I thought about her.

She says mean things like my husband and I are lucky because we were getting a lot of money from my mom and stepdad that passed. She said this on the day that my husband’s father passed too. She always says things like yeah they have everything and I don’t. My husband stayed on my side but only after a lot of fight .me and her , we never talked again.

Karen kept talking bs about me to Michael and trying o make him not marry me and saying that she was never going to say sorry to me. Mind that at the same time, Michael and I were wedding planning.

In to our wedding planning, he’s mom and little sister,did not care about being present on absolutely nothing. He’s mom would only call to tell him that she was crying every night because her kids were farther than before and that he needed to fix this. Him??? Why him?

2 months before our wedding, we finally saw each other and it was so fake. I never felt that they liked me. Never felt welcomed. We sent save the dates and she did not even called her brother to say that she got it because she believed that he was not happy with me and that he didn’t love me that much to marry.

2 months before our wedding, they started in a fake way to show interest. My whole wedding planning was a stressful time because we had to deal with her drama and jealousy on top of planning the wedding that is stressful by it self. Even in this time, she wanted to have the attention to her. I asked do not wear black in my wedding because in my family tradition, this shows that you are against the wedding.

Guess what?? They wore black. We never vibed. I tried for my husband to forget everything and just pretend that nothing happened but I’m not fake and I couldn’t care less about her.

We were never good. She tries to compete with me on everything but i'm not competing and she always have tantrums. Now, 1 year after our wedding, it’s time for her wedding and I’m acting like nothing is happening just like she did. My husband couldn’t care less either and we just know whats happening because their mom talk too much.

She never gave us any gifts . She had the audacity to give him a papaya for his bday gift years ago. Wedding gift? Of course not!!! And now she calls my husband cheap when he does not pay the restaurant bills for her and her dude.

She always says in front of Michael that her wedding will not be not even close to ours trying to see if the says something about helping with money. Michael pays all theirs moms bills and all of them use our streams for free. AITA for acting just like nothing is happening on her important date?

Oh and by the way she wants to have her bachelorette party at my house and wants us to pay for it! Not happening girl!

This is what people had to say to OP:

Senior-Animator-7386 said:

Your husband needs to grow a spine

Odd_Tea4945 said:

What a toxic person! I'll do the same as she did to you: this is not important. Bachelorette party? On your dime girl and not happening in MY house. I think your husband has to start calling her dude cheap because he doesn't pay their own restaurant bills.

OP responded:

For real ! Cheap is giving him a papaya with a bow on top as bday gift! They live for free at a home that is his father’s rental home. Dude works with father too and don’t get paid enough. Mostly goes on gas.

RedReaper666YT said:

Just don't go to her wedding, and for the love of Gaia kick both of them off your streaming services! Why on earth would you allow someone who continues to disrespect you so horribly yo use shit you have to pay for?!?

Nancysotoo said:

How incredibly audacious of your sister in law. Move far away. I love how traditions are referred to when it benefits them. You and your husband are now one. Scriptures says you leave your mother and cleave to your wife. Now move far away.

Make known that phone calls to pass on happy thoughts would be appreciated.
Begging for money would not be. Boundaries. Make them, express them, stick to them. Except no violations of them. Communicate it.

OP responded:

You are so right! We are actually buying a house in another state so the process already started! Fingers crossed!!!!!

wishingforarainyday said:

NTA So you husband financially supports your bullies. Wow. He doesn’t seem to respect you. I’d be rethinking this whole situation. He should have told off his family and shut them down. Instead he just says awww stop it- here’s my money. Is he willing to go to therapy? Because he’s being a doormat and he allowed them to trash talk you repeatedly.

OP responded:

For some reason, he fells guilty for making more money than them and does what he does. He started therapy and let’s see where it goes. We are trying to move out of the state so that might help too! He’s mom retired early for no reason and now I see her almost everyday asking him for money. He’s the type of person that tries not to get into a fight. He listens and do not say a word. He really needs to change that!

Powerful_Bee_1845 said:

He told you who he was and you thought you could change him. Nope. It will be easier to move on than change him.

And OP responded:

He is a good man to me and I love him. He just needs to understand that he is being used. I think that the main reason for them to hate me is because they knew I was going to find out what they were doing I make him stop!