Groom is accused of 'choosing' 'spoiled child' mom over 'type A' bride-to-be.' AITA?
"AITA for 'choosing my mom' over my bride-to-be?"
My fiancée's bestie and her mom are currently planning her bridal shower. For some context weddings are a huge deal in their circle and I know what events like this mean to her. She is super type A, girly girl, even tried to plan her own proposal lol, so I know she needs this to be perfect.
The date they picked is my mom's birthday, but I really didn't think anything of it. I expected she might not attend, but assumed that would be ok. Well my mom declined the invite and when asked why, she explained it was her birthday. MIL nagged her about how "the kids' future" should be more important than your birthday and my mom said "I think they can survive without my gift."
So obviously they were both pissy with one another. My fiancee brought it up to me that she thought my mom was being a "spoiled child" and that I should "put her in her place" I said that my mom has every right to decline. It isn't as if she declined the wedding, and they knew it was her birthday when they planned the event. I said my mom was polite until MIL came at her.
I really didn't expect my fiancee's reaction but she got emotional and said I was choosing my mom over her and I am just making excuses, because I couldn't possibly find her behavior ok. The issue is I do find her behavior ok.
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
kathryn_sedai said:
NTA, and it sounds like your fiancée is trying to pull some weird power move. She knew this is your mother’s birthday-why would she not expect to celebrate her own birthday on the day? Of course she has other plans.
Careless_Welder_4048 said:
NTA your mil and fiancé seem a little unhinged good luck.
spookycupcake666 said:
NTA. If my husband told me we were doing an event on his mom’s bday I would change the date. It’s totally fair for your mom to do what she wants on her birthday.
ProfessionSanity said:
Wow a perfect example of a Bridezilla moment. NTA. Happy Birthday to your Mom!
Last_Friend_6350 said:
NTA. She tried to plan her own proposal?!? Wow, seriously, don’t marry into this family. It will be a living nightmare.
Karma_1969 said:
NTA. Your fiancé sounds like a high maintenance diva. She thinks “putting people in their place” is a valid strategy to resolve confrontation (pro tip: it isn’t). Are you sure you want to marry that?