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Groom calls bride 'insecure and selfish' over guests wearing 'white.' AITA?

Groom calls bride 'insecure and selfish' over guests wearing 'white.' AITA?


Everyone knows you're not supposed to show up in a white lace gown to a wedding, but there are surely some exceptions to the all white rule, right?

So, when a frustrated groom decided to vent to the moral compass of the internet otherwise known as Reddit's 'Am I the As$hole' about his bride's (and soon-to-be-ex wife's?) wedding day behavior, people were ready to deem a verdict.

"AITA for calling my wife insecure and selfish on our wedding day?"

I (28m) and my wife (26f) got married last Wednesday and the ceremony was amazing. My wife was very strict on the fact that no guest is allowed to wear white, which is understandable because for females that’s considered rude or bad luck at weddings I think.

The reception was going well too, until I noticed my wife walking over to the bathroom with her face held in her hands. Obviously I could tell my wife was upset as we’ve been together for three years now and I can tell when she’s upset.

I rushed across the room telling guests “one minute” as I hurried by them. Once I got to the bathroom I knocked on the door and informed my wife that it was me at the door.

After a few minutes I heard the door unlock and open. When I got in a saw my wife sitting on the floor with mascara running down her cheeks.

I asked what was wrong and she told me that one of our nephews was wearing white jeans and a white bow tie. I immediately thought to myself how she was completely over re acting because he’s a six year old child and had no idea that you can’t wear white to a wedding.

I told her she was over re acting but in a much nicer way and I said that she should go enjoy the reception and forget about the whole thing. She eventually texted her sister to come to the bathroom and fix her makeup so she could go back out and have a good night.

After a while I saw her talking to my sister, the mom of our nephew, and I thought she was just making conversation. About an hour later my sister pulled me aside and berated me for my wife’s behavior. She said my wife had asked her and her son to leave unless she had a change of clothes for him.

This was far from okay to me so I asked my wife to talk and explained everything my sister told me, my wife said she was completely in the right for what she asked and i told her that if she kicks my family out then I will happily leave too.

My wife started crying again and saying that this is her day and she doesn’t want it to be ruined by our nephew. This angered me because I had enough of her ruining our day over something silly.

I then said she was not only selfish but that she was insanely insecure if she’s worried about a six year old looking better than her.

My wife’s been staying with her mother since the wedding and we haven’t spoken once. Her mom reached out to me this morning and said that I need to apologize right away for being “out of line.' I really don’t believe I’m in the wrong here so what do you think? AITA?

Here's what the jury of internet strangers had to say about this mess...

walnutwithteeth said:

NTA. Jesus. It's a 6 year old in a bowtie. Did she think people would confuse him for the bride? Is she 3ft tall, and was she wearing a bowtie? She was insecure and selfish. It wasn't 'her' day. It was both of your day. And she ruined it by throwing a tantrum.

Take a good look at how she handles conflict as this is going to be your marriage. Doesn't like your response? Throws everything out of proportion and runs to mummy. It's early enough for an annulment. Think about it.

Penguin_Doctor said:

NTA. I would be upset too. It's not just her day, it's yours too. And there's no reason she should try and kick out your 6 year old nephew because he had white jeans on. Pretty sure she didn't have to compete with a 6 year old boy.

Monday0987 said:

ESH. Why would your sister dress her son in white knowing it's not acceptable? Does she dislike your wife? On the surface your wife is unreasonable and overreacted, it's a male child not a woman in a white dress.

However if she is used to crap from your sister then her reaction would make sense as she would know that this was a deliberate act by your sister against her. You didn't deal well with the situation well.

ParsimoniousSalad said:

NTA. I think they call this 'annulment.'

Johnny-RN said:

NTA. Jesus Christ. Have she always had these 'problems' throughout your relationship?

fubar_68 said:

NTA. But Finding out you married a psycho on your wedding day. Priceless. Get that annulment.

Yikes...good luck to this seems like there might be more problems than white bow ties in the future.

Sources: Reddit
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