'AITA for hijacking the best man's speech to embarrass him ruining the wedding?'

"AITA for hijacking the best man's speech to embarrass him ruining the wedding?"

I (25f) have been best friends with Izzy (25f) since secondary school we used to hang out constantly and were pretty inseparable for years. When we were about 16 she started developing a crush on my older brother (27m).

At the time it was kind of funny but also sweet and a couple years later they actually started dating properly and have been together ever since. When they got engaged she asked me to be maid of honour. Originally, my brother actually wanted one of his friends to be best man but my parents pushed for my younger brother (19m) instead so he “wouldn’t feel left out” and eventually he agreed.

One thing to know about my younger brother is he genuinely thinks he’s hilarious. He’s always had that edgy 14-year-old humour and insists if people don’t laugh they’re just “too soft”. He talks all the time about how he could probably do stand up one day. Before the speeches my older brother had actually told him to keep it short and normal.

His speech started normal enough a few jokes about my older brother growing up and some harmless embarrassing stories people laughed. Then he started talking about Izzy. First, he exaggerated about how she used to have a crush on my brother and said she was basically obsessed with him when we were teenagers.

He joked that my brother used to call her his “little stalker” and even said she probably only became friends with me to get closer to him. Some people laughed but you could tell she was getting uncomfortable.

Then he kept going with more stories about their early dating years I'm not going to repeat them here because honestly they were embarrassing and definitely not appropriate for a wedding speech.

Most people had gone silent and it was very awkward but my family was still laughing though. My older brother looked uncomfortable by the end, but at the start he was laughing along too which honestly made it worse. Izzy looked absolutely horrified like she wanted to disappear.

At that point, I’d had enough, so I stood up interrupted him and said if we’re telling humiliating stories about people maybe we should include some about you as well. I took the mic and basically did my speech right then instead of waiting.

Most of it was about how great Izzy is and how long I’ve known her but yes, I did include a few stories about my younger brother too nothing made up just things he definitely hoped would never be repeated in front of our parents his girlfriend and about 100 wedding guests.

People were laughing again but this time my parents and the rest of my family looked horrified and my younger brother stormed out. Now my parents are furious, saying I ruined the speeches and made the reception awkward. Apparently, embarrassing Izzy was just “part of the joke” but embarrassing him crossed a line.

Izzy did thank me later and said she was relieved someone stopped it but also wished it hadn’t turned into such a big scene. So now I’m getting blamed for ruining part of my brother's wedding AITA?

Here's what people had to say to OP:

Beautiful_Net5000 wrote:

NTA. Your family is nothing but a buncha enabling bullies who let your rude punk kid brother essentially humiliate the bride and groom but especially the bride, wherein guests were awkwardly silent after awhile because the anecdotes were no longer funny in a traditional sense but still heartwarming or wholesome.

It's hilarious that he became such a crybaby who ran away when getting his medicine shoved down his AH gullet, and frankly I would've brought stories about your parents during the speech as well to get the point across. Tell them that he'll live and you were just making sure he was "a part of the joke" too.

OP responded:

He's so hypocritical. I'm soft when I don't like his offensive misogynistic joke, but when I make fun of him I'm now the big bully.

anxious-designer9315 wrote:

If little bro can dish it out then he needs to learn to take it too. NTA.

Just keep pointing out to anyone who raises it that you did nothing your bro wasn't already doing to others in the room.

OP responded:

My family's point is what he did was "different" somehow and that I should know better.

Good_Display_3972 wrote:

You are a good friend and your family is horrible. Glad Izzy has at least you in her corner.

OP responded:

They've always dismissed his horrible jokes which I could put up with, but the whole wedding thing felt like a step too far.

Serwrong wrote:

You need to get your older brother to tell off your family. He needs to defend you.

OP responded:

I'd rather let him try and enjoy their moment then have be bothered by family drama.

Illum503 wrote:

ESH. NTA for stopping your brother of course, but you could have left it at that but instead YTA for one-upping something that shouldn't be happening at all. The bride herself straight up told you she wishes it hadn't turned into such a big scene. Is the wedding about her, or about getting justice against your brother?

OP responded:

She was upset IT turned into a big scene not that she thought I caused a scene.

TurbulentBullfrog829 wrote:

ESH.

Well done for jumping in but you should have just done your normal speech. No need to try and embarrass your little brother. It's a wedding, it should be about the couple not your squable. Not the time or the place.

swirlyflurry wrote:

NTA. Tell your brother that if he can’t take a joke that he must he “too soft.”

Seriously — why would it be okay to humiliate the bride as “part of the joke,” but embarrassing stories about the best man are what ‘ruined the wedding’?