'AITA for humiliating my father-in-law at my wedding dinner?'
"AITA for humiliating my father-in-law at my wedding dinner?"
Me and my Husband got married in the courthouse last week after being together for 6 1/2 years. Nothing fancy but truly the happiest day of my life (I always thought people were exaggerating when they said that but glad I was wrong).
We only had our parents at the actual courthouse and planned a larger dinner party later into the night. We didn’t exactly do speeches but we decided to read our vows in front of all our friends and family. I went first and I’ll be honest - I’m a yapper. And a crier. In the moment I had no idea how long my speech was but I’m told it lasted around 6-7 minutes.
I just had so much love I wanted to share in that moment that I frequently strayed from what I originally wrote and went on tangents. my FIL then proceeded to get up, walk across the room, take the mic and say to the party “try and keep it short, deary” I just scoffed and said “well I guess you would have the authority on short things.” the room burst into laughter.
Now. context: my father in law is 60~ years old and 5’3 (he put 5’6” on his license but I think the DMV just pittied him too much to correct it). He quite literally has the body of a 12 y/o boy.
We have not had a great relationship with my husband’s parents. in fact he was completely no-contact with his mother for 5 of the 6 years we’ve been together. I talked my husband into inviting them to the wedding because I do value the sentiment of them being there for his big day.
My FIL initially waved his hand and just sat back down. I assumed he took the joke like a champ and that was the end of it. I was truly on cloud nine that night. as we were saying goodbyes I noticed that my FIL and MIL were already gone. oh well, they have animals at home and had a long drive.
I sent a quick text in the group chat “Hey! Sorry we missed your exit! thank you so much for coming, it meant the world :) hope you had a great night!” the next morning he calls me and explodes. He’s screaming, he’s cursing, he’s calling me names. At a point I just had to hang up because I was just being berated. I genuinely didn’t even know what he was upset about at first.
He then shows up to our apartment to continue his tirade. saying I humiliated him and I should be ashamed for disrespecting him in front of all those people. my husband wasn’t home so I was just kinda stun-locked at this point. I could barely get a word out before he just stormed off. he’s now blocked up on everything and won’t speak to us. AITA?
Here's what people had to say to OP:
Elegant-Analyst-7381 said:
NTA for the joke but, honestly, this feels like karma for forcing your spouse to invite his parents when there was a good reason they were no contact.
bayleebugs said:
YTA for having your partner break no contact. It was clearly for a reason.
my80saddiction said:
ESH. Your father-in-law's part is obvious - don't start none, won't be none - but I'm not sure why you invited your in-laws if your husband was against it. Was that for him or for you?
Low-Support-7090 said:
YTA for not listening to your partner, and now this is what your wedding is remembered for.
Head-Emotion-4598 said:
NTA. He shouldn't dish it if he can't take it. And, honestly, 5 minutes isn't really that long of a speech. It was YOUR day after all.
mikoline97 said:
NTA for the joke. You have to know how to take a joke when you like to give one But YTA, Your husband doesn't seem to have relations with them but you still insisted on inviting them just to please yourself, not for "your husband's big day."