Younger siblings run because their older siblings walk for them. Sometimes older siblings resent the young ones who benefit from the fights and struggles. In the same way, people who have paid off their student loans don't want student loan forgiveness. On a popular Reddit thread in the Am I the A**hole Subreddit, two siblings have growing pains with each other.
AITA for not clapping when my sister sang in her voice class?
My sister (15) and I (19) are taking the same voice class at a community college. The course requires that you sing five times over the semester. My sister is timid and has sung five times, but it's always been on Zoom for the professor.
A couple of things are nobody knows I'm her sister (she's adopted, and we look nothing alike), and she's by far the youngest in the class (most of the course is in their mid 20's-early 30s), so everyone kind of babies her a little.
My mom's friend's daughter, Anna (25), is also in the class, and my mom asked Anna to watch my sister and make sure she was doing okay. Anna also drives my sister to and from class because I go with my friends. Anna babies her a lot. She gives her candy and takes her out to eat before class, and she makes sure everyone's really nice to her.
My sister sang on Tuesday, and while she was in a practice room, Anna went around telling everyone to clap for her no matter how she did and only to give nice comments because she was terrified. Then my sister sang, and she sucked. She looked down the whole time and had her arms around her chest. They had to restart the song twice for her. She was ahead of the music and didn't get half the notes right.
Everyone clapped for her except for me; it was time for comments. I don't think I was rude, I just told her that the song needs a lot more work, she should probably pick a different song, and she needs to calm down before she sings again. She ended up crying, and Anna gave me a death stare.
Anna ended up taking her home early, and when she got back to class, she pulled me aside and asked if I really had to make those comments and if it was necessary, it couldn't have waited until we were home and she wasn't on stage in front of the class. I said that I would've said that to anybody, and she doesn't get special treatment just because she's afraid to talk or sing in front of people.
When I got home, my mom yelled at me for being mean to my sister and said she cried in her room for half an hour because of how her performance went. I don't think it was a big deal, but everyone else does, so I wanted to know if I was the a**hole.
YTA (You're the A**hole). I teach theater at the college level. Rule number one in my class and every performance class I've ever taken you to applaud everyone unless you are explicitly meant to withhold applause. You honor that person's work every time, without fail.
The feedback is perhaps a different issue, but it sounds like you went out of your way to bully your little sister, not to offer the same constructive feedback you'd give another student. Do other students typically give harsher feedback, or is that usually the professor's job? In either case, while Anna is not doing your sister any favors, you are far more TA.
YTA, for the manner in which you gave feedback, it was overly harsh. Feedback should be things like 'It was very brave of you to perform, and it was clear you were nervous. Next time, some deep breathing ahead of time might help with the nerves. I like X about your voice and think a song like 'example title' would showcase X more effectively than this song did.'
YTA. She was trying to overcome fear, and you made the experience more embarrassing. People with anxiety about doing certain things need to expose themselves to the situations to learn there’s nothing to be afraid of. You showed her when she tried. If she fails the first time, you’ll be there to tear her down instead of pushing her up.
*Takes out an envelope and pulls out a note* OP, the results are in...YOU ARE THE BROTHER! So be nice to your sister, man!