'AITA for not wanting to go to university, but instead be a 'loser' in trade school?'
"AITA for telling my parents I do not want to attend university."
ThinCold2885 writes:
I’m 16M and live in Canada with my immigrant parents (41F, 55M), who have always dreamed of me becoming a doctor. It's the typical story: get good grades, go to a top university, become successful.
I understand why they want that for me, but I’m struggling in school. Even though I study hard, I can’t get my grades up, especially in chemistry and biology. I’m more interested in math.
I’ve realized I don’t want to be a doctor. The process is long, stressful, and just not for me. Instead, I want to become an electrician. The job pays well, is in high demand, offers solid job security, and I’d eventually like to open my own business in a bigger city.
I could even get started earlier through a co-op program in high school, but that means switching out of my current courses (bio, chem, physics). When I told my parents, my mom flipped out and called trades jobs something “losers” do. My dad was more open but still wants me to stay in my current classes “just in case.”
Now, my mom says that if I don’t get 95% or higher in science this year (I currently have a 60%), she’ll punish me and ground me all summer. I feel like I’m being forced onto a path I don’t want, and I’m tired of not being heard. AITA for wanting to take a different path?
OP posted a small addition.
I just want to add that my mom is genuinely a good person. We just don’t always see eye to eye. She’s never been the type to care about appearances or bragging rights, so I don’t think this is about her wanting to say “my son, the doctor.”
Also, we’re immigrants from the Middle East (Palestinian, to be exact), not South Asia. My dad is an accomplished dentist who owns a dental practice, and there are many doctors in my family, along with others who are currently studying to become doctors.
Here are the top comments.
LateForDinner61 says:
NTA. Electricians and other tradespeople are in high demand and can make an excellent living. College isn't for everyone. Do you have counselors at your school? Maybe they can talk to your parents?
empreur says:
A friend of mine‘s daughter in, I believe grade 10, join this special program, where she continued working on her high school, diploma evenings, and weekends, but was an apprentice electrician during the daytime.
By the time she finished grade 12, she had completed her electricians apprenticeship, had just about six figures in the bank, and graduated high school. She’s now making bank at commercial construction sites. Trades are not for losers. We need more tradespeople.
FoxxFluxx says:
NTA. Electrician is a good career choice. You need to sit your parents down and have a discussion with them. They'll need to accept that you're not going to be a doctor and respect your decision to become an electrician.
SuperLoris says:
When I got my first job after grad school (I have a Ph.D.) I was super excited and getting my apartment set up and one of the tasks was having high speed internet installed. Got to talking with the installer b/c I was super excited and I told him about my shiny new job and my Ph.D. and I'm so excited and I'm making more money than I ever made.
He looked a little sheepish and I asked him what was up and he told me what he made. It was nearly twice what I made after six years of grad school and $100K in loans. He trained for six weeks and loved his job. As an electrician, your job can't be offshored, likely will be hard to convert to AI, will always be in demand, and won't put you in horrific debt. It's a great choice, your parents should be proud. NTA.