Woman hooks up with her childhood bully on the night of her wedding asks AITA?
I hooked up with my childhood enemy on my wedding day.
Sad-Situation-5363 writes:
For reference, this happened about 5 years ago, but I was confronted about it recently. I am a very boring person, and this was literally the only dramatic thing that has ever happened to me in my life.
6 years ago, my fiancé proposed to me. I was thrilled. We planned a beautiful, intimate wedding. I’ve always gotten along with his friends and family. His mother adores me. We’ve disagreed, but we didn’t argue. We found ways to resolve our problems. Inside and out, we were a great couple.
I never thought he would literally leave me at the altar. Our families, friends, and even the officiator kept trying to reassure me, but almost two hours after the ceremony was supposed to start, I got a call saying he got cold feet and didn’t want to get married. He wanted to get more out of life before being tied down.
I did some things I’m not proud of. I begged my mom to get me out of the dress, and I tore the stupid thing. I left the wedding after everyone kept looking at me with pitying eyes. I fended off a lot of calls from friends and family, telling them I was fine and I didn’t want to talk.
Here’s the thing I was called an AH for. I have a frenemy. We’ve known each other since middle school. He’s always been a class clown bully. I was not attractive growing up, and he would jokingly flirt with me and try to annoy me as much as possible. He never really grew out of either of those things.
So when he called to check up on me or really to rub it in my face that I was dating a loser who dumped me on my wedding day, he asked if I wanted to hook up with him. I said yes because my life was ruined anyways, what could be worse? He picked me up, and we slept together.
He is the second person I had been with, the first being my fiancé. It wasn’t religious; I just saw it as special that we were each other’s first and only. My fiancé evidently didn’t feel the same.
I blocked my fiancé, as did the rest of my family. His mom profusely apologized and said his late father would never have approved of what he did.
My now ex-fiancé contacted me recently. He wanted closure, he said. He apologized for ghosting me, but he immediately said that it didn’t justify me sleeping with someone else the night of our wedding.
I told him it wasn’t a healthy thing to do, but I’ve gotten comments from his friends that I acted badly and they would’ve left me too. I don’t even know what I did wrong. AITAH?
Here are the top comments from the post:
Aussie_nub says:
"but he immediately said that it didn’t justify me sleeping someone else the night of our wedding." Who gives a f&^k what he thinks?
Rantarian says:
Well, it wasn't the night of your wedding if you didn't get married. And you certainly weren't a couple any more. Tell him to get f%@#ed, and to jam his 'closure' where the sun don't shine. NTA (Not the A%@$ole).
EggsAndBeerKegs says:
Night of your wedding? You didn’t have a wedding, he gets NO say in anything you do ever again. You should’ve told him you were glad because you didn’t know what you were missing either, and leave him to mull that over for the rest of his life NTA.
FirstEnvironment418 says:
NTA I don't know about anyone else but I see being left at the alter a break-up. I don't know how he expected to come back from that if that was “his plan” (maybe “his back up plan” fell through) you don’t owe him anything.
What do you think? Was OP wrong to hook up with her frenemy?