'AITA for saying my husband's ex was jealous at our wedding after she said she could've been his wife?'
"AITA for telling my husband's ex to keep her jealousy to herself?"
Impressive_Apple8399 writes:
I (30F) am newly married to my husband, Rick (30M). Rick was raised with his friend Maddie (30F). My MIL (50F) and Maddie’s mom have been best friends since they were babies. Rick and Maddie dated back in high school, but it didn’t work out. However, they remained close friends. I should also note that Maddie married my older BIL five years ago.
Now onto the present. Rick and I spent the last year wedding planning and going through all the traditional events that come with it. It’s been an incredibly stressful time, but since Maddie is my SIL, she was at almost everything. Normally, this wouldn’t be a problem—I like Maddie—but as time went on, she seemed to get angrier with me.
This all led up to our rehearsal dinner when she started making comments “in a joking manner.” Things like, “I could have been his wife” and “I would have looked stunning next to him at the altar.” This continued throughout most of the meal.
I admit I was irritated and not enjoying myself because of it. When she “jokingly” asked Rick why they broke up again, I decided to speak up and told her to keep her jealousy to herself. She acted like she had no idea what I was talking about.
I told her I’d had to listen to her little remarks during the rehearsal for my wedding, and I was tired of it. She went quiet, but my BIL and MIL kept giving me weird looks for the rest of the event.
When Rick and I got back from our honeymoon two days ago, my MIL pulled me aside and told me that what I said was incredibly rude and that I owe Maddie an apology. Now, I’m starting to wonder if I was actually in the wrong here. Rick says I was justified, but MIL and BIL are still upset with me. AITA?
Here are the top rated comments:
Kami_Sang says:
NTA – Tell your MIL that Maddie was the one being rude and disrespectful. She made your rehearsal dinner about herself and Rick’s past relationship, making you uncomfortable. Yes, you reacted, but you had every right to—not to mention, you shouldn’t have had to deal with your husband’s ex bringing up their past during your wedding events.
Maybe Maddie thought it was cute or funny, but to you, it was insensitive and upsetting. Your wedding was not about Maddie or her history with Rick. You are not apologizing to Maddie.
And frankly, if it were me, I’d tell MIL that I’m a grown-a@^ woman, and it’s not her place to tell me to apologize as if I’m a child. I can judge my own actions, and I’m completely comfortable with them. Sometimes, you have to be an A to make a point and stop other A’s—like Maddie—in their tracks.
Vyckerz says:
NTA - what Maddie did was way out of line. Your mother-in-law is also way off base in supporting Maddie in this. Also, your brother-in-law is mad at the wrong person. He should be upset with his wife for saying that his brother should’ve been with her instead!!
Chaos_incarnate_9 says:
Why was the BIL not mad his WIFE was joking around about ditching him for his brother?
wheprisonbih says:
Where was your brother in all this? What has he have to say about what his wife did? Tell your MIL to f%@k off.