'AITA if I report a nurse for asking for my number during a procedure?'

"AITA if I report a nurse for asking for my number during a procedure?"

I (21F) had an EMG this morning (it’s a test where they use little needles and electrodes to check how your nerves and muscles work). It’s already a vulnerable situation since you’re lying down in a cold room in a backless gown and can’t really leave in the middle, and on top of that I have anxiety as well and I didn't bring anyone to the appointment with me like I usually do.

The nurse who was doing the first part of the test (the electrodes part bc the actual doctor does the needles) made me really uncomfortable. He kept flirting and asking me out even though I tried to shut it down. Just a few of his comments are listed here (I couldn't remember them all after the fact).

“I’m also a personal trainer, maybe I can help you stretch sometime.”

"Am I charming you? Am I making you nervous?"

“I want to show you around the city, maybe we could get together and find a nice spot.”

“Can I get your number? You’re so beautiful.”

“You have such a beautiful skin complexion. Like a Nubian or Egyptian. Where are you from?”

“Why don’t you date? Why are you single?”

"I want to take you driving"

When I explained I’m happy single and don’t want to casually date for religious reasons, he said “You never know, maybe if you find the right person. I’d love to show you around.”

He also commented on old scars on my arm (they’re clearly old SH scars). Literally no other medical professional has ever brought them up, not even the neurologist that came in right after him, so that felt like he was violating my privacy. At some points he even held onto my arm in a way that made me really uncomfortable.

For context: I’ve never had a boyfriend, never even held hands with anyone, and I’d never even gotten male attention until recently. I also have really bad anxiety, and during the appointment I kind of shut down and couldn’t think straight. He was clearly older than me, and I felt really vulnerable the whole time.

I tried to redirect the conversation but he kept pushing. At the end he asked for my Instagram — I said I don’t really use it, but he kept at me ("you don't wanna go on a date so at least give me that much. You should hit me up sometime") so I gave him my public account and blocked him as soon as I got to my car.

I felt so nauseous and guilty sitting in my car, especially because I kept engaging with him and responding to his questions. I feel like I should have said something about how he was making me feel weird, or asked for another nurse, or even complained to the doctor but I didn't know what to do. I feel like I should have stood up for myself, but on the other hand I couldn't even think straight and I was so panicky.

Now, on one hand this felt super unprofessional, inappropriate, and unethical. I don’t want other people to be put in that position. On the other, I feel bad about potentially affecting his income/job...

...especially with how things are in the economy right now, and I'm also worried about the possibility that he has access to and can see all of my medical information and personal info. I have no idea what to do, and I'd really like some input or advice from someone who works in the field or has experienced this before.

Here's what people had to say to OP:

MrsCakeakaJane said:

Hello, nurse here. Please report this person for unprofessional behavior.

Fit-Presentation3203 said:

Nope. NTA. He knows exactly what he was doing. He knows just how incredibly inappropriate what he did was. Report him and don’t feel bad, he knows that as a medical professional he is in a position of power and responsibility to help you and he is trying to use it to get what he wants.

Report him. Do not let him think he can get away with making people who go to him for medical treatment do what he wants or take advantage of them.

plagueprotocol said:

NTA. You deserve to be treated with respect, and should be able to go through a medical procedure without having to deal with being hit on. This is unacceptable behavior, period.

Hairy-Glove3261 said:

NTA. They were completely unprofessional.

Traditional_Bug678 said:

NTA. You should report it. He seems incredibly brazen, as if this is not his first time doing this, and reporting will hopefully save others the discomfort. I'm sorry you're dealing with this.

PezGirl-5 said:

NTA. And as a nurse I am sickened by this. This person has no place in healthcare.

catherinecalledbirdi said:

I'm a nurse. Report him. If there's multiple ways you can report him, use all of them. Tell on him in every way possible. You said you're worried about affecting his income? His income should be affected by that!

He has no business earning his money this way if this is how acts with the people he's supposed to be taking care of! I don't even have the words to convey how gross this is. Get him fired. For everyone's safety.

FIRST UPDATE:

Thank you all for your comments, I really appreciate the advice and as well as the support. I sent an official complaint to their HR office, and I'm on hold with the patient advocate right now.

I really hope that they can make it so that guy can never do this again to anyone. Someone in the comments said to see if I can report him to the state board so i'm gonna do that next. Thank you.

FINAL UPDATE:

Reading through all your comments has made me feel a whole lot better. Also, thank you to everyone who corrected me, it turns out he is an EMG Tech, not a nurse. Good news though...

They identified him and I have a meeting tomorrow with the director of patient services for that facility to discuss the matter further, and I’m also going to report him to the ABEM like one of you suggested.