'AITA for charging my sister to stay with me for X-mas because her kids are horrible?'
"AITA for charging my sister’s family to stay in my house during Christmas?"
DrWhineDilf writes:
I (31F) recently bought my dream home after working hard for over a decade. It’s a beautiful 4-bedroom place with a huge backyard and a pool. I’m single and live alone, but I love the extra space and use the rooms as an office, a guest room, and a gym.
My sister (35F), her husband, and their three kids (7M, 5F, 3M) asked if they could stay at my place for Christmas. They live out of state and wanted to spend the holidays with our family without paying for a hotel. Initially, I was okay with it until I remembered the absolute chaos they bring wherever they go.
They stayed with me for a weekend last year, and it was a disaster. The kids destroyed my sofa with markers and spilled juice on my rug, which I had to replace. My sister brushed it off, saying, "Kids are kids," and didn’t offer to pay for the damage. Her husband barely helped with cleaning or watching the kids. I felt like a maid in my own house.
So, this time, I told her they could stay but with conditions. I sent her a “house guest agreement” where they’d agree to: Pay a $100 cleaning fee upfront. Cover any damages immediately. Pay $50 per night for utilities since heating and water costs spike in winter.
I don’t think this is unreasonable. I love my family, but I also want to protect my home and avoid unnecessary stress and headaches during the holidays. But she flipped out. She called me greedy and said I was treating my family like “Airbnb guests.” She argued that it’s the holiday season and I’m ruining the spirit of giving. Our parents are siding with her, saying I’m being ridiculous and cold-hearted.
I argued that this is my house, and I’m not obligated to let them stay for free when I know they’ll cause damage and stress. I’m sure they can afford it since they just spent thousands on a Disney trip. I’m only asking for a fraction of what a hotel would cost.
Now the family is divided. My sister says I’m the a^$%ole for prioritizing my money over family. I think I’m being fair by setting boundaries, but maybe I’ve taken it too far? I don't know—please help. For those who want to know, I spent at least $500 to replace my sofa and rug after the kids damaged them last time, and my sister didn’t offer to help with the cost.
Here are the top rated comments:
pixie-ann says:
NTA but it’d just be better if you said no. Regardless of how much money you charge the kids probably won’t be any better behaved. The husband won’t be any less lazy and neither of them will be better parents. You’ll be on edge the whole time and they’ll be resentful. They may even see payment of fees as giving them a free pass to be slobs.
Better for them to stay with your parents or anyone else who is on their side (put your money and your peace and sanity where your mouth is folks) and you can enjoy your nice clean, undamaged home.
CreativeMadness99 says:
NTA but I think it’s better to ask them to stay with your mom or an Airbnb. If they didn’t respect your home before, they’re not going to do it now.
Secret_Sister_Sarah says:
NTA. $50 a night plus $100 for cleaning is NOTHING compared to what they'd pay for an actual AirBnB. Stick to your guns on this one, otherwise they'll come in spilling and breaking without a care in the world for you or your property.
Careless_Yoghurt_822 says:
I would have sent her the receipt for the damage the last time. She wouldn’t have asked again or she would have paid up.