'AITA for not wanting to be my half-siblings guardian if something happened to my mom?'
"AITA for telling my mom I'm unwilling to be my half siblings guardian if something happens to her and her husband before they turn 18?"
Goldyiaugh writes:
I (20F) have three half-siblings (7, 5, and 4) from my mom’s second marriage. My dad died when I was 8, and recently my mom has started thinking about what would happen if something happened to her and her husband before my half-siblings turn 18. She and her husband made a list of people to ask about taking the kids in if that ever happened.
The list went: my grandparents, her husband’s parents, my aunt, uncle, another aunt, and then her husband’s brother. None of them were willing or able to say yes. My mom also asked her cousin, who she’s close with, but she said she couldn’t do it because she already has a large family.
I was the last person on the list. My mom told me that too. She said she knew it was a big ask, but everyone else had said no. She explained that they would be setting aside money for that situation and that she understood I was young, but she wanted to make sure the kids would be taken care of.
I told her I wasn’t willing to do it either. She asked if there was anything she could offer or promise that would make me reconsider, and I told her no. I said I would be a bad fit for that role anyway.
My mom was really disappointed, but she accepted my answer. Her husband, however, wanted to know why I refused. I told him that I would be a bad fit, and that was all he needed to know. He told me I should agree for the simple fact that no one else in either family is willing, and the kids could end up in foster care.
My mom said they would have to look through their friends to see if anyone would be willing to agree. Her husband is still pushing me to justify my decision, even though he hasn’t shown the same energy toward anyone else they asked. I don’t think that’s fair. His main issue seems to be that I said no at all. Am I the bad person for saying no?
Here's what people had to say to OP:
Junior-Trade5338 says:
The parents should mention the multimillion dollar life insurance policy they have which will go to those who take the kids. I'm sure some family members could find it in their heart then.
hungry_bra1n says:
The bigger issue is why everyone is saying no.
bettertitsthanu says:
NTA Your siblings are not your responsibility. You didn’t choose to have them. Every time I see parents forcing older children to parent their siblings it infuriates me. This is not your responsibility and they shouldn’t make you feel bad about it. I’m sorry you lost your dad so young.
OP responded:
My mom eventually came to accept it once she realized there was no reassurance that would change my mind. I understand why she asked and wanted to hear yes so bad. But her husband only became forceful with me for a better or more detailed answer which I find funny.