'I’m planning to shoot my shot with my kid’s teacher tomorrow.' AITA?
"I’m planning to shoot my shot with my kid’s teacher tomorrow..."
Tomorrow is the end of year parent teacher meeting for my son and I’ve decided I’m gonna ask his teacher out. Yeah. That’s the plan. She’s been his tutor for two years now. She’s gorgeous, super kind, always positive. Like, legit sunshine in human form.
And I swear she treats me a little differently than the other parents. She always parks her bike right at the school gate and sometimes she just stops to chat with me. Nothing big, just little convos. But it feels nice, y’know?
And not long ago we ran into each other at a bar. She got her coffee, saw me, and just sat at my table. We talked for a while about everything and nothing. I’ve been overthinking that moment ever since.
Anyway, tomorrow is the meeting to talk about how the tiny gremlin (aka my son) did this year and I’ve decided I’m gonna ask her if she wants to grab a drink or go to the movies or whatever. Casual. No pressure.
I’m torn between telling her straight up to her face (ballsy, I know) or leaving a little note on her desk after the meeting with my number and a “hey, wanna hang out sometime?”
Don’t imagine anything tacky, I’d just leave the note written in their name on one of those I have at home. I don’t know. My stomach’s in knots already. But I have to try. Worst case, it’s awkward for like…a year? Wish me luck, internet strangers.
Here's what people had to say to OP:
CanUHearMeNau said:
Don't leave a note. Just ask. Good luck!
superminingbros said:
A note is weak af, shoot your shot! All she can do is say no worst case, her loss!
no_idea_wtfffff said:
How certain are you she’s not just being friendly/that she doesn’t also do this with other parents? Lots of times we can be friendly and guys misconstrue it as interest. With that said, nothing wrong with shooting your shot regardless, but what if she says yes?
Are you going to have a Lorelai Gilmore situation where it’s making things awkward for your kid? Is she going to be his teacher again for any one class? I don’t know how old your kid is, but just throwing out some things to consider. Nothing inherently wrong with dating your child’s teacher, but it can affect the children in ways that differ from dating literally anyone else.
sarahshift1 said:
I’m just thinking about this poor teacher having to sit through all the rest of the parent teacher conferences for the rest of the day after getting creeped on by a rando dad. Don’t ask people out at work. Wait until you see her again at the bar or something if you have to ask her out.
TinyMachine6735 said:
I would advise NOT asking her out while she is at her work. It is completely possible that she is only pleasant to you because she is at her job and it is a requirement. I think a better move would be to ask her out, outside of her work environment.
Asking her out while she is in her work environment puts her in an awkward position and may make her very uncomfortable. It could make future interactions equally (or even more) awkward if she is not interested. Not to mention the fact that this could damage the relationship between her and your son.
Life-uhfindsaway said:
Dude don’t do this. Teachers have to be nice to parents, this sounds a lot like the waitress/nurse/stripper whatever treated me special. It’s their job. Sitting at the bar with you could’ve been a million different things. Kudos to waiting til the end of the year but it’s not a good look.
deadletter said:
As a teacher, I can say that it might be better to lower your ask even from “a movie or something“ to simply, do you wanna hang out outside of school at all this summer? Simply do you want to spend time outside of your professional duties is better than “do you want to go on a date with me."
I think that if they wanna hang out outside of school, they’re open to the possibility of being friends, and if that friendship leads to something else fine, but jumping straight to do you want to get romantically involved is more pressure than I think you wanna offer. Even if it’s “casual no pressure or whatever."