'AITA for calling my sister a jealous hag because she got judgy over my husband making me an Easter basket?'
"AITA for calling my sister a jealous hag because she got judgy over my husband making me an Easter basket?"
PerfumeInABottle
My husband and I do Easter baskets for one another, and this year he gave me mine early since I’ll be gone. In the basket was the usual, dark chocolate bunny, Starburst jelly beans, and then some Swiftie stuff from Etsy, a fidget toy, and really surprisingly he got me three full bottles of perfumes that were on my wish list.
Hundred Silent Ways, Bianco Latte, and Oriana. I was shocked bc that’s a BIG spend. I was over the moon and took a pic and posted it to Instagram stories. The next day, my sister came over.
I’d left my basket on the table and she poked over it and took some jelly beans and then made a comment asking me if my husband had stepped out on me or something and was trying to make it up to me.
I was like… no? Of course not. Why would she say that? She asked why he’d go “all out” like this then, and how it must be nice to have all this extra money to spend when everyone around us is struggling. Oh it must be nice to have such a picture perfect marriage.
I was really taken aback and asked her what her issue is. She was like “most women I know can’t even get their husbands to fill a Christmas stocking for them and you’re out here bragging on yours and shoving it in everyone’s faces.” She said she was lucky if she got a card for her birthday.
I told her to stop blaming me because SHE chose to marry a thoughtless man. That she had the CHOICE to marry someone who did nice things for her, and she CHOSE to marry a man who doesn’t help around the house, buy her flowers, etc. And to not be a ridiculous, jealous hag because she chose to settle for less.
This set her off and she started arguing with me more, telling me that I’m messed up for calling her a jealous hag when there’s nothing to be jealous of, more like embarrassed that it’s 2024 and I’m acting like life is a romcom, that the fact that I even listen to Taylor Swift is proof that I need to grow up.
I told her to just get out and doubled down on her being a ridiculous, jealous hag. Now that I'm on the other side of the country for work, I feel like maybe I was over the top in calling her a jealous hag.
“You’re just jealous” is the most annoying comeback in the world and I used it on my own sister. She also typically texts me throughout her day and she hasn’t sent me anything since then, which means she is definitely still outraged. AITA?
Here were the top rated comments from readers in response to the OP's post:
SheLikesToWatch_1989
NTA and I don't know why this made me chuckle. I love reading about sisterly spats. Things goes from 0 to 100 too fast, too often. And always sooooo catty. An Easter basket from your loving husband, huh? That's what you think makes you special OP? LMAO 🤣🤣🤣🤣 All jokes aside, your sister is dying of jealousy, let's be for real.
She seems so angry but it's not clear what that has to do with you and a picture of a gift you received??? I'm guessing she married who she married, and like most women out there either chose an oblivious stinker or forgot to 'educate him on how to treat her'.
And......somehow that's your fault? Like how is it your fault that her husband can't even get her a birthday card? 🤣🤣🤣🤣I'm dddeaaad. This is really messed up to disclose but your sister reminds me of my Mom (God forgive me, I do love her).
My father is a pathetic excuse of a husband and partner-truly one of the worst out there, and she will get so bent out of shape if one of her friends post a loved up picture with their husbands on holiday, or their husbands with their gift.
She won't understand why they need to 'show off', that it's 'childish'. Then proceed to spill on every marital difficulty these couples have faced, from infertility to cancer, whatever.
Then go and on about what my father doesn't do. And not just to me. But to EVERYONE she meets and she's very sociable. My poor father has no clue the kind of bashing his reputation has taken out here.
More often than not, I very loudly remind her: "Your Dad told you not to marry him, but you thought you were clever, thought you were smarter. You made your choice, now deal with it"
P.S: Did your sister really eat your candy as she was talking that garbage??
The OP responded here:
PerfumeInABottle
LOL yes, she ate my jellybeans. But at least she ate the grape ones and not the red ones.
notmappedout
NTA. You're probably right that she's more upset that she sees what she could have (someone who does thoughtful things for her) and is jealous over it. But the fact that she jumped to questioning if your husband cheated on you is gross. It's not pretending to live in a rom com to have a mutually reciprocal marriage.
For what it's worth, I would also not marry someone who didn't match my effort in our relationship. more people should consider this. Also, hundred silent ways smells like heaven. I aspire to own their whole collection.
Taru-Shinkicker
NTA for calling her out on her jealousy, as she was the one who made an issue where one didn't exist, and then attacked you by trying to say that your taste in music made you immature.
Different people have different budgets, and therefore different lifestyles. That's just the way things are. Where you were kind of TA, is when you commented on her relationship with her husband.
Is the guy truly thoughtless, or did you just irrationally lash out because your sister was being aggressive? If her and her husband can't afford as lavish as gifts, that doesn't mean that what they do get is any less meaningful.
Cocosito
NTA. I think the inability to express joy when something good happens to someone else is absolutely the worst personality trait in a person. Implying your husband is unfaithful because he made a nice gesture is incredibly immature. She's lucky you don't just cut her out of your life entirely if this is how she typically behaves.