"AITA, if I kick my brother (30M, the golden child) out for cursing at me in my own house where he doesnt pay or do anything?"

While I(28F) was looking for a job, my brother (30) offered to help and I moved in with him. I was so grateful. I cleaned the house, prepared our meals, did everything around the house.My BF(29) felt responsible for me and brought bags of groceries everyday to compensate what I ate. After a month, I threw away a trash bin swarming with worms. I replaced it with the exact same thing.

My brother told me I had no right and kicked me out. I moved in with my BF. The next day my mother called. I never tell her anything. She said 'it is your fault. It is his house. You dont have right to his stuff. He is your brother, you gotta obey him.'
Not long after, I found an amazing job and house. BF and I moved in together.

I wanted to help my brother and told him that he could live with us for couple of months, save money and move into a better place. I told him not to worry about the rent and other utilities, because we are family. He did nothing around the house.
I bought a TV my brother became obsessed with. He would watch TV all day everyday. One day I told my brother dinner was ready.

He turned the TV on and left the room. I was laying the table I opened a news channel. He came back and complained, switched the channel back. I told him we should watch something that we can all enjoy. He insisted that he came first, we were gonna watch what he wanted to watch. I told him to switch back. He did not. I told him to give me the remote control and he did not.

After demanding the remote control the 10th time, he threw it on the floor. I told him he cannot throw stuff in my house because it did not belong to him. I told him he was not doing anything in the house to help but at least let us rest and enjoy our day while we can. For the context, my BF and I both study for our post gradutes, have jobs and work in the house.

He screamed and cursed. Next day my mother called and asked what happened and I refused to answer. She then told me it was my fault and told me to be polite to him because he was a guest. He was my brother and I gotta obey him.

2 weeks ago I broke my ankle.Last friday I was working on my assignments with this excruciating pain in my ankle! My mother called and I refused to make a comment on the fight. She then started to cry saying brother had to order take out. We did not have food.

I then realized I was so busy working and trying to make it to the deadline that I forgot to eat. It was not important of course, my brother had to order take out! Unthinkable! Today my brother said, 'As your brother I came and am apologizing for cursing at you. I know I am right in the fight so I expect you to apologize'.

I told him I did nothing wrong and was not going to apologize. He told me I was sick in the head. He was saying things as if my mother was talking. He told me I had narcissistic personality disorder. He was done and I was dead to him. My BF told me my brother suffers from 'favoritism'. AITA, if i want to cut contact with them and kick him out of my house?

What do you think? AITA? This is what top commenters had to say:

crazygoreflower said:

NTA honestly your family sounds very sexist I'd kick him out and cut them off.

soundspretty said:

NTA - Because it's your brother's house you have to "obey" him (don't even get me started on that) and now he's in your house and you still have to "obey" him because... he's your brother? No, it's because he's a man and your mom is encouraging this misogynistic BS. He can go live with her if she's that concerned.

dph99 said:

NTA. You're suffering from 'deadbeat leech brother disorder' -- kick him out (don't forget to change the locks). BF is a saint.

And anxiousexistential said:

NTA. Goodbye and good riddance. He can make his own meals and he can help around the house. You do not have to "obey" him.

**Update**

After reading your comments and discussing them with my BF, I decided to call my mother and explain what really happened. So, I called, tried to tell the story from my perspective. I started off by saying, I am not her and her world views do not necessarily reflect mine. She interrupted me 100 times as she does. She did not even try to see things from my side.

As we all guessed she sided with my brother. It was an 1 hour call so I might skip certain things but I remember her blaming me for leaving food in the refrigerator for my brother. Apparently, paying the bills, cleaning, doing the laundry and cooking are not enough, I also have to call him to the table and make sure he does eat. Her exact words were "you are treating him as if he is a stray dog."

I will let this sink in for you guys. Surprisingly, she did not know my brother does not pay for anything. It is very convenient my brother forgot to tell her this. She denied always siding with him. I told her to give me 1 example when she sided with me. She could not. Well, of course. At the end of our call, I told her I am used to not having a mother in my life but if she truly loves my brother she should stop spoiling him.

He never had a Gf, doesnt have friends and is the most selfish person I have ever seen. He expects everything to be served on a silver platter. She was shocked as if she never realized that my brother doesnt have anyone beside us. I told her to think about what I told her and call me back in 2 hours if she agrees with me. She did call to my surprise and told me that I am a very compassionate and a good hearted girl.

This could be the very first time she ever said something nice about me. I thanked her and asked for a favor but she will have to accept beforehand. She agreed and I told her to stay out of our arguments with my brother. He always thinks he is in the right because she sides with him unconditionally. It is always 2 vs 1 against me. We will see if she keeps her promise.

Later that night I walked in my brother's room and told him I was hurt not because he threw the TV remote or not following my rules, but because I don't deserve to be called names in my own house at the age of 28. He apologized for swearing and screaming and agreed not to do that anymore.

I told him I am not the sole decision maker in our house and I have to respect my BF's wishes as well. Since he has been a burden for us emotionally, financially and physically we both appreciate if he could find his own place as soon as possible. I told him even though he kicked me out, I will never do that to him. BF told him he can stay with us until he finds his own place.

He is still with us. He tries to help around the house. Yesterday he asked if he could watch TV. LOL. BF knows he is a keeper now. Thank you all for your kind words and I apologize if I offended anyone in any way.