'AITA for leaving my sister’s kid with a family friend?' 'She was hours late picking him up.'
"AITA for leaving my sister’s kid with a family friend after she was hours late picking him up?"
I (36M) agreed to babysit my sister’s son (8M) last Friday night so she could go to a friend’s event. She said she’d be back early Saturday morning, and I was happy to help. I even planned some activities for us before she came by, since I don’t often get to spend time with my nephew.
Saturday morning rolled around, and by 9 a.m., she hadn’t shown up. I texted her, and she replied that she was “on her way,” so I didn’t worry. We had breakfast, hung out, and waited around until about 11 a.m. I texted her again, mentioning that I had plans at 3 p.m., and she replied with “be there soon.”
By 1 p.m., I started getting anxious because I still hadn’t heard anything more. I tried calling, but she didn’t answer. I left a voicemail reminding her I had plans later in the afternoon and needed her to let me know her ETA.
By 2:30, I was really stressing. I had been planning to leave by then to get to my friend’s party, but she still hadn’t shown up or answered her phone. Finally, around 3:30, after calling and texting with no response, I reached out to a family friend who lives in my building. She’s known my family for years, and my nephew and sister know her well, so I knew he’d be comfortable and safe.
The family friend was happy to help, so I explained the situation and left my nephew with her, giving her my sister’s contact info in case anything came up. When my sister finally picked up her son at 5 p.m., she was furious. She accused me of “abandoning” him, saying I’d “had one job” and should have waited.
I explained that she’d promised to be back in the morning, then ignored my texts and calls. I also told her I’d left him with someone we all trusted. She said I should have sacrificed my plans, even if it meant waiting all day, since family comes first.
I feel guilty for leaving him, but I was hours late to my own event and frustrated by her lack of communication. AITA for not waiting for her to show up and leaving my nephew with a trusted family friend?
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
shammy_dammy said:
NTA. She's the one who abandoned him. Her "one job" is to be a parent. Family comes first? Obviously not, since you are family and you're coming last.
soggymobflip said:
NTA. The child's mother wasn't there at the predetermined time. If she was willing to actually get in contact with you and be up front about the actual arrival time, she could've had a say in where her child will be spending the remainder of the time. Definitely NTA, she should've been more responsible.
saltedcaramelcookie said:
NTA funny how she can’t be responsible enough to show up when she said she would, but berates you for not being responsible. She used you and then got mad at you for not allowing it.
Eastern_Condition863 said:
NTA. "She said I should have sacrificed my plans, even if it meant waiting all day, since family comes first." This is the pot calling the kettle. All SHE had to do was sacrifice HER plans. She had no intention on coming home in the morning. Did she ever say where the heck she was for 8 hours?!?!
Ok_Childhood_9774 said:
Of course you're NTA, and I guess sis will need to find a new sitter because I would never be willing to help her out again.
teresajs said:
NTA. Do NOT agree to ever babysit for her again.
joe-lefty500 said:
NTA This is perfect. Next time sister asks you to babysit, you can say you’re incompetent and to get someone else. Her treatment of you is disgraceful.