'AITA for not letting my brother and his girlfriend have the bedroom?'
"AITA for not letting my brother and his girlfriend have the bedroom?"
Me and my brother share a room. We're both guys 23 and 21. His girlfriend comes over every weekend and usually stays for two nights. When she comes over my brother asks me to sleep downstairs in the sitting room or in my sisters room if it's free.
I've been doing this for several months but I'm really getting sick of it and I've told him I don't want to do it anymore. I pay rent, like he does and I feel I shouldn't have to give up my bed every weekend. I need good sleep and I get cranky without it. He tells me he needs the room because his girlfriend has isomnia and has trouble sleeping.
She finds it very difficult to sleep downstairs. His gf also sleeps until like 1 or 2pm most days and so the room is off limit to me and I have to ask my brother to go in to get my clothes. I'm really not happy with the situation.
The argument my brother brings up is that I left for a year and wasn't living in the house. During that time he met his girlfriend and he had the room to himself and she came over all the time. then I moved back in and he agreed to share the room with me but only if I would give up the room when she came over.
My argument to this is that he would've been forced to share the room whether he liked it or not as my mother would have made him. So i don't think this point holds much weight. I don't think he had dibs on the room if we both pay equal rent right?
I don't think this is fair but maybe I'm being stubborn. I'm not really sure so wanted some other peoples opinions. Much appreciated.
Let's see what readers thought:
fon0i8 writes:
NTA. The room is just as much yours as it is his, and he doesn't get to tell you every weekend to sleep somewhere else so he can have "privacy". If he wants privacy with her, they need to find somewhere else to be.
Also there is an unwritten rule somewhere that people sharing a room with another person should not have overnight guests in said room.
With your ages, it would be healthiest to find your way toward separate rooms however possible.
pla90 writes:
NTA. your brother is so greedy. the fact that they've been doing that for over a year, what else does he want? he could sleep at his gfs too, you're not obligated to tolerate him bringing her over all the fg time.
its crazy how he wants everything to himself. also I'm curious on why the gf doesn't feel bad that you have to leave your room for two nights and discomforting you. also the fact that she sleeps till late, is she expecting you to just wait for her to wake up and not go to your own room since then? they both need to be humbled
glamingbaon writes:
NTA. Tell your brother that you've been more than gracious for a year. They need to do a little reflecting on how this is impacting YOU and your sleep. How their inconsideration is affecting your life.
You don't pay your brother rent, it's not his house. You pay your mother and she agreed to let you move back in. I'm assuming his gf doesn't pay anything. Put them on notice that you are done. No arguing. If they want to be angry, let them. They'll get used to it, or they'll move out.
plapoy4 writes:
I was on OP's side until he said he had agreed to use a different bedroom when his brother's GF was staying over as a condition of sharing the bedroom. So, YTA. You don't like how it's working, so you need to either move back out on your own or permanently move to a different bedroom.