'AITA for making my son pay for his school lunch for the rest of the year?'
"AITA for making my son pay for his school lunch for the rest of the year?"
I have three kids, all in high school. I used to give everyone 20 dollars a week to pay for school lunch and it is enough to have some extra for snacks. They all were able to budget it well. The school then went all digital and stopped taking cash. They need to swipe their ID and money gets put into the account.
The system is a pain in the ass and only allows you to do large amounts into it. So for all the kids I did enough to make it through the whole school year it was 1000 each. (this is around 200 extra, then what they need).
I made it very very clear that this is for the whole school year and only for lunch. The school has also has some vending machines that takes the id also. These vending machines are expensive. A pop tart in it is 4 dollars for example, and energy drink is 5. The school also has a cafe, that serves expensive stuff, everything is 5-10 bucks there. A bagel is 8 dollars.
My kids are all in sports and they know they need to pack extra snacks/ meals on sport days from our house. The issue is my son, (16) I got a notification from the school that his balance was in the negatives. He was not packing any snacks and eating breakfast at the school cafe. He is around 50 in the negative right now.
He needs around an extra 500 dollars to afford lunch. I gave him two options, he can pay for it out of his own money or he packs lunch everyday. He chose paying for it and is very unhappy. I already transferred the money out of his account for the school account. I know he is unhappy but ex is pissed at me. I told them to pay for lunch themself if they have an issue with it.
I need some opinions. He has budgeted large amounts before, example he bought himself a gaming computer that was over 2,000 dollars. He has a job and we have given him a good amount of money for a long time. He knows how to budget and save.
Here's what people had to say to OP:
ElleCapwn said:
NAH: this was a learning experience for both of you. Consequences are fine, as long as you back them up with more support and guidance. What I find way more upsetting than a kid spending more than they have is the school charging premium prices for anything.
We had vending machines in school, and they were not designed to turn a profit… just to create sugar dependency and brand loyalty. Everything in they were stocked with was priced the same as it was sold for individually at the local Walmart.
bionicfeetgrl said:
NTA. This is a lesson for life. There’s so many people with untold amounts of debt because of swiping. Your other kids managed to understand the assignment because the expectations were clear. That means it’s safe to assume breakfast and lunch options were there at home and the other two didn’t starve. Some lessons have to be learned the hard way. Hopefully he’ll take a different approach next year.
GirlDad2023_ said:
A 16 year old should know how to "budget" for lack of a better word. That much money in his account and now he's in the negative? He needs a hard wake up here. NTA.
adventuresofViolet said:
NTA, he's only paying for his lunch because he refuses to pack his own. This is a good lesson. If your ex has an issue with it, they can pay.
starrrrchild said:
NTA. Your son made his choice.
ButItSaysOnline said:
NTA. You laid out the plan and you provided more than enough. He choose to spend it unwisely.