Man asks niece to change baby's diaper; she refuses; he makes her homeless.
Moving in with family while being an adult is a recipe for disaster. It may be nice for a short period of time, but as time goes on, small things can begin to cause tension, like not doing dishes, leaving the toilet seat up, or watching TV too loud.
One man has difficulty living with his brother while he goes through a divorce on a popular Reddit thread in the Am I the A**hole Subreddit.
He writes:
Context: I moved in with my brother after my divorce three months ago and brought my 18yo daughter with me. My brother and his girlfriend have a nine-month-old daughter (my niece).
I was out of the house for hours. My brother's girlfriend was on a shift (she's a nurse), and my brother was in a Zoom meeting. He watched the baby via nanny cam, and she needed a diaper change, but he was so busy. He texted my daughter, asking if she'd go in and quickly change her cousin's diaper, but she refused.
Babies are weird.
She told me that she had her reasons. One, she doesn't feel comfortable around babies, and two, she was already late for her friend's birthday party (her other friend and brother were waiting on her outside). My brother insisted, but she refused, making him leave the meeting to change the baby's diaper. My daughter was out of the house at that point.
I got home, and there was a huge argument. I found my brother berating my daughter for not helping with her baby cousin and doing him this small, one-time favor while he was busy with work. My daughter was crying, so I told my brother off and said that his daughter was his and his girlfriend's responsibility and he shouldn't rely on my daughter for her care.
You live in your brother's house. You live by his rules.
He explained how it was just a one-time favor and how he's been very supportive of us since I divorced my ex, but I told him that it's not an excuse to force my daughter to do what she didn't feel comfortable doing. His girlfriend called me an ungrateful a**hole and told us we had two weeks to move out.
I tried to speak to my brother about his girlfriend's decision, but he shut me off, saying I was wrong for telling him off instead of holding my daughter accountable for her lack of support.
The internet is on team nobody is a jerk BUT...
Ok_Leg_6429 says:
Your Brother is responsible for taking care of His Daughter. OP is responsible for providing Housing for himself and His Daughter. When someone is doing You a Big favor, it might be wise to reciprocate with small favors.
RatioNo1114 says:
Your daughter does not owe your brother childcare services, but on the flipside, your brother does not owe you and your daughter room and board. So NAH (No A**hole Here) technically, but it's your fault for getting kicked out.
Individual_Ad_9213 says:
No judgment from me because this is not an ethical or moral dilemma. Whether you're right or wrong is irrelevant here. You have two weeks to move out. So ask yourself if your daughter's refusal to change her cousin's diapers was worth it.