'AITA for bringing my new GF to my friend's wedding? She dated the groom.'
"AITA for bringing my new gf to my friend's wedding?"
My (28m) friend Josh (28m) got married to his partner of 7 years Emily (27f) this past weekend. On the invitation it was stated that a +1 was allowed. I've been single for most of the time but one month ago I got with a girl, Chrissy (28f) who I've known for years.
Chrissy used to date Josh on and off in high school and early college until josh broke off things with her and got with Emily. Due to different circumstances, josh doesn't even want to hear about chrissy.
I thought that after so many years have passed and we've all matured and grown there would be no issues. He hasn't talked to her in 7 years but I've kept in minimal contact to the point we reconnected as friends few months ago and then we started dating.
Assuming there was no issue since chrissy seemed chill with being invited as my plus one, I brought her. I didn't think I'd have to notify anyone for this. Emily and josh didn't see her at first but Emily spotted chrissy once the ceremony was over and she froze.
I could tell she was mad but was trying to play it cool because of the wedding. I knew there it would be an issue. Before I even arrived at the reception venue josh called me while I was parking and told me what the hell was I thinking and that chrissy needs to go home now. I tried to reason with him saying I can't just send chrissy home because her house is more than an hour drive from the venue.
I tried to reason with him explaining how it's been 7 years, if he's mature and really over her he'll be okay with me bringing her. After all he just got married, he can't be mad I brought his ex from over 7 years ago.
He started screaming at me about how "IT'S THE PRINCIPLE YOU AH, THE PRINCIPLE. I'M OVER HER OF COURSE THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN JUST BRING HER AROUND. IT'S THE PRINCIPLE. EMILY IS UPSET BECAUSE OF YOU AND HER.. SEND HER HOME NOW."
I ended up calling chrissy an Uber, which I paid for. Chrissy was mad at me for giving up so easily and also thinks I'm a weak ah.
Here's what the top commenters had to say about this one:
Few-Mushroom7496 said:
Ummmm why would you invite your friends ex girlfriend to his wedding let alone date her? That’s very awkward and you shouldn’t have assumed it would be okay. Chrissy thinking you’re weak for that is a red flag. Her ex and his wife don’t want her at his wedding….did she ask you to take her as your plus 1 btw? YTA.
CakeEatingRabbit said:
Bringing the gf of a single month is already super werid and would be rude where I live. Bringing the ex of the groom, which the groom wants nothing to with, is another level. YTA.
Sunnysmama said:
"Due to different circumstances, josh doesn't even want to hear about chrissy." Well, that was your clue that bringing her to the wedding would not be ok. Yet, you chose to upset the bride & groom on their wedding day. Out of curiosity, what were the "different circumstances?" Why on earth did you expect them to be ok with bringing her? YTA.
MediumWellSteak8888 said:
YTA. You didn't "bringing your new gf to your friend's wedding", you brought his ex and you know it. Are you truly so socially incompetent to not realize this would be an issue?
WalkingToConclusions said:
"AITA for bringing my friend's ex-girlfriend he does not want to hear about and hasn't been in touch with for 7 years to his wedding without asking him?" Fixed your title. Not sure how you and Chrissy can both be so clueless about things, but you seem like a good match. YTA.
SeethingHeathen said:
YTA. I feel like Chrissy is going to break up with you now that the wedding is over. She wanted in, wanted Josh to see her, and you were the ticket. There's no other reason she would want to go to this wedding other than to be seen and hope it rekindled something in Josh and put doubts in his mind about marrying Emily.
chaserscarlet said:
You know this girl is your friends ex. You know he hasn’t spoken to her in 7 years. You know he doesn’t even want to hear about her. Yet you decided the best plan would to be to bring her to his WEDDING with no notice?
Either you’re an absolute idiot or you knew the answer would be no and decided not to ask in the hope that they wouldn’t tell her to leave if it was too late. YTA.