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Man doesn't disclose his age to his 'friend with benefits.' AITA? UPDATED.

Man doesn't disclose his age to his 'friend with benefits.' AITA? UPDATED.


"AITAH for not disclosing my age with a woman I’m FWB with?"

I (m23) met a woman (f40) at a bar and we hit it off right away. She is very beautiful. We have been meeting several times a week. She just left a loveless marriage and wants to have fun. I’m not looking for anything serious.

Then she texted me all angry saying she just googled my name. I have deceived her by not saying that I’m born year 2000. She thought I was older since I told her that I’m an engineer and she assumed I’m in my 30’s because its a 5 year long education when in reality I graduated last summer and just started working.

I told her what’s the difference? We both don’t want something serious and I really like her and love being with her. She even knows that she’s the best I’ve had.

I got upset and I called her childish and ageist and that if she cared and it was so important, she could have asked how old I am when we met.

She called me an AH and said she disclosed her age the moment we met because she didn’t want me to feel tricked into sleeping with someone older. Her last text said AHOLE! Wtf?

Here's what top commenters had to say:

skallywag126 said:

It sounds like the topic came up, so why didn’t you tell her?

CptKUSSCryAllTheTime said:

NTA. She assumed and she was wrong. That’s on her.

Mothkau said:

YTA for the way you reacted, NAH for improperly guessing your age. Not sure how she got 30 because your lack of maturity shows in this post.

Ready_Competition_66 said:

Dude, you called her childish. You were the AH by doing that. She was upset but she could easily have been talked down into an actual friendly conversation. Instead, you verbally slapped her.


Wow, thanks all for the support. I didn’t expect this. I called her and apologized about everything I said. She apologized for being irrational and impossible to talk to.

But she doesn’t want continue seeing me. I told her I liked her and enjoyed her company and she said that’s the problem and I would understand when I get older. In a few years she’s gonna be 50 and I will be in my prime and want a family.

I got very angry about the “you will understand when you get older” part because I do understand right now too but said nothing. Like yeah why not end it then instead? Not like we have other things to do now.

We have been texting and I told her that we should at least have a break up hookup because I didn’t know the last time we were together was our last time. She agreed and I’m spending this weekend with her and then I promise you I will just delete her contact information and never call or text or bother her again. Peace!

Most people here thought OP was in the wrong. What's your advice for them?

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