Man reminds house guest: 'I'm not running a bed and breakfast.' 'Things got...weird.' AITA?

"AITA for telling my friend it’s her own fault she didn’t get breakfast — and reminding her 'this ain’t a damn hotel?'"

I (26M) have two best friends — Jess (29F) and Mike (31M), who are married. They’ve been staying over at my place on some weekends here and there while they’re between apartments. I love them, but recently things got...weird.

Jess is very much a “Pinterest board meets lifestyle influencer” type of person. Everything needs to be aesthetic and curated, including breakfast. Meanwhile, Mike and I are just go-with-the-flow types. Grab a bite when you’re hungry, nothing fancy.

Anyway, Jess asked if we could all have breakfast together in the mornings. I told her she’s more than welcome to make whatever she wants — she basically lives here on weekends at this point — but I work late nights and like to sleep in. I let her know she could absolutely make herself breakfast at whatever time she wanted.

But instead, she chose to sleep in until like 11 a.m. or noon every day. By the time she got up, Mike and I had either already eaten or weren’t even hungry. She started getting annoyed that we weren’t all sitting down to eat together or that we didn’t wait to eat the same thing. But like...I’m not running a bed and breakfast?

The kicker was on the last day. Jess asked if I could make my “famous cinnamon rolls” (they do go kinda hard, not gonna lie). I said sure — if she woke up early enough. Surprise: she didn’t. She stayed in bed until noon again, then got mad that I hadn’t made them. I told her, “You didn’t get up. That’s on you.”

She didn’t say much then, but days after they left, she brought it up again — saying how disappointed she was that we never had “those cozy, shared breakfast moments” and that I should’ve made more of an effort. At that point, I just reminded her: I was doing them a favor letting them crash at my place for free. This ain’t a damn hotel, and I don’t come with room service.

Also, unrelated but maybe relevant to the vibe — after dinner one night, we were all down to go to Dutch Bros, and she promised Mike we would go. But when it was time to go, she threw a whole fit because “the vibes weren’t right” since the sun had gone down. Like…ma’am.

You promised your man a drink. The vibes weren’t dead — just the daylight. So…AITA for not playing Airbnb host and telling her she’s the reason her breakfast fantasy didn’t come true?

Here's what people had to say to OP:

runelowell said:

NTA. Your friend Jess is self-absorbed, entitled, and inconsiderate. She wants group breakfast yet she refuses to get up early or even on time and prepare or help prepare the idealized breakfast/brunch she's envisioning.

She wants cinnamon rolls and you agreed on the condition she wakes up so shell have them fresh, warm, and gooey, and yet refuses to put in any of the work herself which is the best and easiest part of this: GET UP ON TIME.

The thing with the Dutch Bros is so sad too like wtf. Just because something doesn't fit her "aesthetic" doesn't mean she can't still go with y'all to get drinks and just hang. Not everything has to be picture perfect/ready for the camera.

She refuses to contribute and only takes, has she ever given back? I personally wouldn't be comfortable hosting her anymore and of this affects your friendship with both of them, so be it. It's not fair to you to have to do things for her if she's going to act like a petulant child. This behavior of hers is most unfitting for an adult of her age.

Eagle-Environmental said:

NTA. Your friends sounds insufferable. Like you said you're not running a BnB. And you actually made it a point to make sure that she has what she needs to make breakfast. She's behaving spoiled.

Rude_Beautiful_2548 said:

NTA. You told you would if she actually woke up. Noon is not a normal time for breakfast and it's totally unfair of her to expect y'all to wait to eat.

kotominammy said:

NTA, you didn't even tell her no. She just had to wake up early...she's the one who didn't put in the effort, just expected other people to cater to her.

RandomRedditor0815 said:

Oh, definitely NTA. The entitlement to sleep in every single day and expecting you to wait with your breakfast for her to wake up is just beyond me.

Random_User1402 said:

I think your friend has a girlfriend problem. She can't be that great to accept such behavior from her. NTA.