Man scares younger brother with autism over loan fraud, 'I guess you go to jail.' AITA?
AITA for telling my brother “I guess you go to jail?"
I (32) my brother Tim (24) has trying to go to film school. In July I got a flag on my credit report someone tried to cosign my name on a private student loan.
I found out my brother somehow got the information from my mom thinking I wouldn’t notice. Tim is on the spectrum. He doesn’t have great judgment but my wife was pissed because we are living with my inlaws (on the other side of the country) saving up for a home once (if) the interest rates drop. I have kept my credit flawless.
So I did the things you are supposed to do report it for fraud. I tell my mom and she doesn’t say much. It slowly comes out that my brother couldn’t get a loan and he found some paperwork about my parents will that had my ssn on it laying around. He couldn’t get the loan without a co signer and put me down.
It takes months for this to come out. So my wife and in-laws pressured me to file charges on Tim. I told my mom what Tim did was wrong and illegal. My mom started crying and handed the phone to Tim and I explained to him about what he did and he needs a lawyer.
Again Tim is autistic and started panicking about what will happen to him after the headache of his actions and everything going on I said “ guess you go to jail."
Since then Tim went into a bad state and his meltdown caused him to be on psychiatric hold. He’s in bad shape and my family blames me because he keeps saying I’m going to jail.
I don’t know if he actually would for what he did but because of what I told him he’s regressed bad and has been in a panic for weeks and is not getting any better. My parents did get him a lawyer to try to calm him down but he’s back in the hospital again for another stay.
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
MontanaWildWiman said:
NTA. Identity theft and fraud are serious crimes. Has he never been held accountable for his actions?
rhubarb2896 said:
Eh, I have autism and so do a lot of people I know. We all know right from wrong, and if he's capable of going to college, he's capable of knowing right from wrong too, it's just an excuse to cover himself. NTA.
Odd-End-1405 said:
NTA. Your brother is a criminal. He attempted and potentially put you and your family at financial risk. Being on the spectrum does not equate to having no morals and immunity to legal ramifications.
You must follow through to ensure this loan is not on your records and you are not party to the fraud. He has legal representation. He can have his meltdowns, but again. Not your problem. Your parents sound a bit complicit.
I would very strongly tell them to destroy anything with your personal information on it and if you found they again tried to assist him utilizing your information, you would cut ties permanently.
Straysmom said:
NTA. He knew what he was doing was wrong. And it sounds like your parents were complicit in this. You absolutely must follow through with the fraud/identity theft charges. Otherwise, your credit will be completely destroyed & you can kiss goodbye to buying a house, car or anything else requiring good credit.
PastaQueen25 said:
NTA being autistic doesn’t make you think fraud is acceptable…
Keyspam102 said:
Nta and sounds like your mother is complicit. I’ve had my mother use my ssn to co-sign loans and it severely fucked up my financial abilities for almost a decade. I didn’t file charges therefore ended up being liable and having to pay some of it and then having terrible credit.
I wish I would have taken it to the police so I could have been free of that. You don’t deserve it and if your brother can’t get approved for a student loan then he absolutely cannot pay it back. What he did is criminal.