Man tells homophobic uncle to go find a hotel if he doesn't like his 'gay pride' home.
You can't choose your family. You can only decide how you react to them. Protecting your sanity is the most important when dealing with stressful family members.
On a popular Reddit thread in the Am I the A**hole Subreddit, a man has had enough of his homophobic uncle and aunt.
He writes:
I (20m) had my aunt and uncle visit my state recently; instead of staying in a hotel, they asked if they could stay at my place. I said yes since they couldn't stay at my mum's since her house is full of other people, and I love spending time with my cousins (5m, 10f, and 14m).
Before they arrived, they started making unreasonable requests, like asking if my boyfriend (25m) could stay somewhere else while they were here, even though he lives here too. I told them to f*ck off with a request like that, and they backed down.
For some context, my family is pretty liberal; the family motto could be summed up as 'mind your own f*cking business, as long as no one gets hurt.' My uncle is an exception; he became religious at some point and then married his wife, which was the same.
Now they have that American q anon brain rot despite us being Australian (not trying to diss Americans, the vast majority are lovely). As you can imagine, that territory comes with homophobia. I try to put up with it for the sake of my cousins in the hope that being around me shows that gay people are people, too, and that there is someone to go to if they are questioning.
A few days ago, they finally arrived, and the demands were immediate. They tried to take down a pride flag I have hanging in my lounge room (the only pride stuff I have in the house) and tried to ask my boyfriend to leave. After being in the house for an hour, I told them they could f*ck off somewhere else if they didn't like my home.
With that, they booked a hotel for themselves and left the kids to stay with me (I'm glad they did, I love having them here, and they are good kids despite their parents). But I'm starting to feel like an a**hole; they can't afford a hotel for all of them, depriving the kids of spending time with their parents on what should be a lovely holiday. AITA?
The internet isn't a safe space for homophobes.
little500HondaCBR says:
NTA (Not the A**hole). Those kids are probably super relieved to get some time AWAY from their bigoted parents and hang out with their cool uncle and his BF.
plainfully_oblivious says:
NTA and why did they leave the kids behind? If you are so terrible to be around, you would think they would have taken the kids with them.
HunterShieldsAU says:
NTA; as a gay man myself I absolutely would never let people stay in my home who would so openly disrespect both myself and my partner. If they can’t afford a hotel then they should have been more grateful for your hospitality; now they are (quite literally) paying the price for that. You did the right thing; homophobia should never be tolerated or excused no matter who it comes from.
OP, you did nothing wrong. Your uncle dug his own grave. You're just letting him lie in it.