'AITA for matching my sister's gift-giving energy after years of her doing the bare minimum?'

"AITA for matching my sisters gift-giving energy after years of her barely doing the minimum?"

I, 36F, take joy in gift giving and seeing peoples reactions to carefully thought out gifts. Christmas and birthdays I make an effort to find and procure items for my loved ones that they want, need, or support their interests. Growing up my aunt ensured me and my sister, 37F, experienced the magic of Christmas with gifts, tree trimming, activities, baking, and cheer; a real sense of holiday magic if you will.

Yes, I buy multiple gifts of varying sizes and value, and yes I do understand Christmas is a time for family togetherness and not about the value of a gift given, and that it can be a hard time for many this time of year. I fortunately am in a position when I can afford to do this.

Regarding my sister and her husband, they have two children: 16M and 9M. I appreciate for a number of years they were a single low income house hold, but for the past two Christmas' both she and her partner have both been working and making a decent income between them.

The reason I ask "Am I the a**hole": Every year, regardless of how early I ask or start trying to help organise gifts from " and family", my sister puts in the bare minimum yet expects individual gifts for her, her partner, and their kids. This is all while they give each household the same large box of chocolates that they have purchased in bulk whilst on sale at half price (this is for a max. of 4 households).

This year, I took her boys out shopping two weeks before Christmas explicitly to help them find, buy, and wrap gifts (all on my dollar with no expectations from them). The boys agreed they were happy to do a nice photo of the pair of them in frames for each set of Grandparents and Great Grandparents.

I asked both my sister and her husband if they could send me any nice pics they had of the pair of them, or get one specific for these gifts. I reminded them several times. I explained what it was for and that I would get the pics printed, in the frames, wrapped, and dropped off at their place for the boys to give their gifts.

Still nothing.

So, this year, I decided: can't be bothered to engage in the one task of your FREE Christmas gift giving efforts? Then I'm done.

Obviously, I'm not a monster and still gave my nephew their gifts, but my sister and her husband got nothing. It also became awkward for them when we did our big family Christmas get together and they only gave boxes of chocolates to people. No additional items, no Me to jump in and help them save face.

Their boys weren't able to give anything but those chocolate boxes to their Grandparents and Great Grandparents. AITA for matching my sisters gift-giving energy after years of her barely doing the minimum?

This is what people had to say to OP:

yamna259 said:

NTA. You didn’t punish anyone or ruin Christmas. Ig the awkwardness wasn’t caused by you, it was the natural result of their own choices once you stopped covering for them.

Zornorph said:

As long as you get presents for the boys, that's all that really matters. I would certainly never get gifts for her and her husband.

Aggravating_Page_531 said:

Be a bigger person, give her a box of chocolates too. Just kidding, NTA.

MuffinTopMagics said:

NTA. Eye for an eye applies to gift-giving too. Seems like she just took advantage of your generosity - and u put up with it for so long. Good on ya for diggin' your heels in: she's gotta learn that Christmas ain't just about taking, it's about giving.