Mom asks if she's wrong throw kid's party the same day as step-sister's wedding.

As far as family obligations go, a wedding is usually a pretty fun one. A kid's birthday party, however...how many times can you pretend to be sick?

A kid's birthday party is quite possibly the most boring event for adults to attend, especially when the child is too young to have any clue what's going on. There's no open bar, it's in the middle of the day, there are kids running around everywhere who just consumed 3 different types of sugar...no thanks!

A wedding, on the other hand, celebrates love and dancing and champagne and obviously if you're forcing relatives to choose between the two then you should expect them to pick a wedding, right? Wrong.

When this incredibly confused mom decided to consult the moral compass of the internet otherwise known as Reddit's 'Am I the As*hole' about her daughter's FIRST birthday party (arguably the most pointless birthday party of them all), people were quick to help deem a verdict.

AITA (Am I the As*hole) for having my daughter's first birthday the same day as my step sister's wedding?

My mom got remarried after my parents divorce and her new husband brought along my step sister. I lived with my dad mostly because I did not want anything to do with a new sibling and had pretty much no relationship with her and hated that my mom treated her like a daughter. I wasn’t the nicest to her but I felt like she was taking my place.

Fast forward to now she is getting married I wasn’t invited since we have no relationship whatever I didn’t invite her to mine either. This issue is I planned my daughter's first birthday and when I told my mom, she said it can’t be that day because it’s my step sister's wedding and can we change it to the next weekend so people don’t have to choose which to go to.

I said no my step sisters wedding is at 8 pm my daughters party is at 1 pm. People can do both but almost everyone on my mom's side rsvp'd no to her birthday party because of the wedding and travel. Even my own mother said she can’t make it because she will be at step sister's wedding and getting ready all day.

I’m pissed. How can she choose a step daughter over her own grandchild? Everyone is picking this girl who isn’t even really family over my daughter. My mom says to just change the party, but I think it’s ridiculous they can’t do both and won’t change my schedule for my step sister. And my daughter will be the one I suffer when one of her family is at her first birthday party.

Anyone who has ever been in a wedding or even attended a wedding should know that you can't really attend more than one event on a wedding day. Of course, the jury of internet strangers was eager to weigh in on this mess...

Marchesa_07 said:

Without even reading all this backstory, yes YTA (You're the As*hole). From the title alone, YTA. 1st birthday parties are solely for the parents. The children have no f*cking clue what's going on. They have no concept of what a birthday is.

Your daughter will not suffer because her family isn't present- your daughter will have no idea what's going on and no memory of her 1st birthday party. She has no concept of time so reschedule to a different day, as requested, if it's so important for your family to attend.

Your daughter will suffer as she gets older because you're petty and have unresolved issues that should be dealt with in counseling. Your daughter will suffer if you continue to attempt to weaponize her as an instrument of guilt in your war with your step sister. Grow the f*ck up.

mdthomas said:

YTA. You know, we know it, everyone knows it. People aren't simply going to do both events. Very few people are going to want to come to a 1 year old's birthday party then go to an adult wedding. You knew about he conflict and went ahead with it anyway, despite the fact that moving it would not affect your child in any way. You're trying to play the victim here when this is all under your control. Please seek therapy.

Low_Kaleidoscope_203 said:

Honestly with how you talk about your step sister YTA. It's not great but clearly she is considered your mother's child whether you like it or not, and you might just need to move past it. Did this girl do anything to you other than be the daughter of your mom's new partner?

jrm1102 said:

YTA - You’ve chosen to have a contentious relationship with your step sister and now you’re letting it impact the rest of your family. You created this situation.

dingleberrydoughnut said:

YTA because you said in a comment you knew it was her wedding day before you planned the party and it’s not your daughter’s actual birthday. You’re causing your daughter to miss out because you can’t grow tf up and realize you are NOT in competition with your step sister.

You are no one to her and she is not out there trying to ‘win’ whatever it is you think it is you’re competing for. You’re a parent now, start acting like one.

So, there you have it!

Everyone agreed unanimously here that this woman is utterly unhinged and expecting family to stop by her 1-year-old's party before attending a wedding is...ridiculous? Good luck, everyone!