Teen gives family a presentation on why 'mom is cheating on dad,' gets it all wrong. AITA?
My sister accused my mother of cheating on my dad because she saw her with another man.
Far_Ear5014 writes:
So my parents have a pretty atypical relationship style, but it works for them. They don’t hug or kiss, and they have a pretty calm marriage.
My younger sister is in college, and she came home with some really weird ideas. She told me and our parents that she wanted to present something she did in class. I didn’t want to see it, but my mom was excited and supportive.
So we gathered in the living room, and she pulls out a slideshow which ended with “Mom’s a cheating wh*re.” Mom’s confused and heartbroken, dad’s yelling at my sister, and my mind is just blanking.
She presents her evidence: a really blurry picture of mom in her car with a guy wearing a baseball cap. She also said that mom’s put in time to look good, she’s getting flowers, and she went through the trash to find out that mom had thrown out some incriminating stuff.
Well, she wasn’t Sherlock Holmes. The guy in the car with mom was my dad. They’re just having a fun time because we’re not kids who live at home anymore.
Now my sister is complaining that our parents are acting cold, especially dad. He had never been cold to her. Mom forgave her pretty quickly, but dad’s really mad for disrespecting his wife and our mom.
She said that she was looking out for dad and it wasn’t fair that he was being mean and distant. I told her it was her fault. She started crying. My family found out about her stunt because my sister was going to send it to them, and some of them said I was the AH because she did it out of love. AITA?
OP responded to some comments:
cocopuffscocopuffs says:
NTA (Not the A%^@ole). Making a slideshow and showing all of you together isn't about love, it was theatrics and drama. And she was wrong. So she set up a whole thing to embarrass and shame your mom when it turns out, your mom did nothing wrong. She should feel bad and it should make her rethink her actions in the future.
If it was about true concern and love she could have approached them privately about her concerns. You're absolutely not wrong to say it's her fault your parents are upset with her. Her actions were upsetting. If you told her it was okay, she would feel justified to pull another stunt in the future.
OP responded:
She just kept arguing with my dad even when he had an explanation. I learned WAY too much about my parents life than I wanted to at the moment. And she was dumb. Obviously it was dad in the car with mom, you could see it in the picture if you’re not a moron.
Tatersprout says:
NTA. So your sister went away to college and instantly became the smartest person on the planet. She also became quite smug. She inserted herself into your parent's marriage. She decided what the rules and agreements are and how their relationship should work, even though it's not even broken.
She didn't care about them when she did this. She attempted to make them look like fools. Because she's so damn smart and perceptive. She's very lucky your parents reacted as they did. This could have destroyed their relationship and your family if their relationship wasn't so strong.
OP responded:
I don’t think my parents would ever cheat on each other. And my dad immediately didn’t believe my sister. My mom was so confused and hurt. I think it might’ve made a marriage problem because my mom forgave my sister but my dad won’t.
Doktor_Seagull says:
NTA. You told her obvious truth. The consequences of her actions. She made a massive error. Even if she was sure of her suspicions, pulling everyone into the room for a "presentation" that ended with calling her own mom a cheating wh%@e, was NOT the kind way to handle it.
She should have clarified with them in private before making that final judgement, if her intentions were to protect dad. Finally it doesn't sound like she's made an effort to apologise to them both properly? No blame on you for telling her why he's acting cold.
OP responded:
It was really humiliating for my mom. I don’t know how she forgave my sister so easily. My dad is obviously way more mad. She apologized and my mom forgave her but my dad hasn’t. He’s been really protective over mom.