Mother warns daughter; 'You're LYING about your medical condition for attention;' Husband disagrees. AITA? UPDATED 3X

When this woman is upset with her daughter, she asks the internet:

"AITA for Calling Out My Daughter for Lying About Having Tourette Syndrome?"

I have three daughters, 'Catherine' (21), 'Alexa' (17) & 'Mia' (14). Catherine and Alexa are very sweet and we rarely argue at all. My daughter Mia is also an incredibly sweet and precious girl yet I get into arguments with her frequently especially as she has attention seeking tendencies.

Over the course of a few months, Mia has started to blurt out random words and aggressively move, (shoulder shrugging, head movements, etc). She's also been making weird noises, I never asked her and ignored it as I thought she was doing it because she was seeking attention.

A few days ago we were sitting at the dinner table and she kept making weird noises and moving and wouldn't stop, it was incredibly disruptive.

My husband got very worried and started asking her if everything was okay, trying to console her, I got mad and told him to leave it as she was probably just seeking attention. My daughter bursted out in tears and wouldn't stop crying. My husband got up and took Mia with him to go outside.

When they came back she calmed down. I told her to stop making noises and to stop moving weirdly, she told her she couldn't control it to which I found ridiculous because she hasn't done anything like this in her whole life.

She said she believes she may have developed tourettes and wanted to go to a doctor. I told her tourettes don't develop like that and she should've told me earlier. I also pointed out how it just magically disappears whenever she's doing something she likes.

My husband is furious with me and so are my daughters, everyone in my house is giving me the silent treatment. My husband said he would be taking Mia to the doctors but I'm not letting him. I told some of my friends and they all agree that my daughter is faking it. AITA?

Before we give you OP's updates, let's take a look at some top responses:

ghad7 writes:

Info: Have you actually sought medical advice regarding this? Have you considered that there might be a medical problem going on?

You realise things like this can literally develop at any point, right? And that some people’s symptoms do stop once they’re distracted or relaxed?

Your daughter should be going to see a doctor and, if you stop that, you are fully the AH here. She quite clearly needs to see a medical professional, and you are only making the situation worse with your ridiculous accusations.

I also think it’s insane that you would convince your friends she’s lying to get them to support you rather than seeking professional advice. It seems like you really have it out for your youngest in this post. YTA.

royalthighness writes:

YTA 100%. I've read your other comments and everything "attention" seeking screams some form of mental disability. You are not a doctor. You are failing her. You're her mother, the one person who is supposed to believe her when she says something isn't right.

What harm would taking her to the doctor do? At the very worst it proves you right, at the best it proves your daughter right and she will get the treatment she is being deprived of.

People don't seek attention for nothing. These are behaviors that often indicate a need that is not being fulfilled. Your daughter deserves better from you.

And now, Update 1:

EDIT: Hi! I have realised how much of a shitty and neglectful parent I’ve been, I’m taking her to the doctors (I won’t be in the room) and plan to make an update post in a few days time.

I haven't spoken to any medical professional regarding the matter. I usually don't go to the doctor for her unless it's a physical thing (eg. she's sick), because she does a lot of things I know are just for attention.

Update 2:

She's asked to go to the doctor for a lot of things that seem unimportant to me, I'm sick and tired of wasting my time. Is there any proof they show up until the age of 15?

The "unimportant" stuff was claims she made about how she may have ADHD and her being unfocused, however when she does hobbies she's incredibly focused on them.

Update 3:

I do not believe tourettes is a 'defect,' because it's not. I'm resistant to the idea because I believe she is just doing it for attention, I'll give an example I told another person in the comments:"One example is that she said she may have ADHD and wanted to go to a doctor.

I remember she had a mental breakdown infront of a huge family dinner because she said was feeling so 'overwhelmed' and everyone was fauning over her. I think that attention made her feel good so she kept doing it again."

I give my daughter attention and I enjoy spending lots of time with her because we have similar hobbies.

Update 4:

I realised how much of a downright awful and abusive mother I've been to my child through the reality check Reddit gave me, (in reflection, it's honestly incredibly upsetting that Reddit of all things was the one to make my realise how much of a horrible mother I've been).

I realised how serious the situation was and that my daughters life could be on the line so I took my daughter to the doctors, she was diagnosed with Tourrette Syndrome and the doctors think she may have ADHD but hasn't been diagnosed with anything in regards to that. (I was not in the room when she got the diagnosis but her father was).

I apologized to my daughter who forgave me, but I really don't think i can do anything to make up for the years of neglect I put her through but I know I can fix things now for the future.

My daughter suggested we take family therapy and also asked if she could have private sessions for herself which I thought was a great idea! (We started family therapy recently).

I've joined a lot of groups that specialise in parenting children with tourettes and it has been really helpful in making me understand what my daughter is going through and how I can provide her with the best support possible.

Thank you so much to everyone who sent me DMs and commented on the post sharing their stories and those who offered to answer any questions I have, everyone has been nothing but helpful.

It's only been a few weeks since that post has been made and a person can only change so much during that time frame but I will continue to better improve my parenting for the sake of my three lovely daughters. Thank you so much Reddit!