'AITA for telling my fiancé’s sister she can't bring her sketchy BF to our wedding dinner?'

"AITAH for telling my fiancé’s sister she cannot bring her new bf to our wedding dinner?"

My fiancés sister has been dating a guy for a few years now who I think is totally sketchy. He told her he has a wife, but keeps coming up with reasons why their divorce proceedings get pushed back and all the wife’s stuff is still in the guy’s house in a separate room.

She told us he “hates taking pictures” (red flag) and the few times he was supposed to meet other people in other family, “something has come up.” He was supposed to be at my brother-in-law’s wedding and at the last minute had a cancel for some reason. I think the guy is lying to this woman and seeing other people on the side and God knows what else.

ANYWAYS. My fiancé and I are getting married next month at city hall in front of our parents, stepparents and his 2 siblings (I’m an only child). Then, we’re going to dinner. This will be the extent of our wedding celebrations, aside from maybe something very lowkey with our friends down the road.

Last week, my fiancé’s sister called and asked if her bf could come. She lives in another state than most of the family, so she thinks this would be a great time for him to meet everyone because “they’ll all be there.”

I absolutely don’t want this. Aside from me thinking the dude is sketchy, I’ve never met him. Neither has my fiancé, his brother nor his dad and step mom. So him being there and meeting everyone for the first time would completely change the vibe of the dinner. My own parents and stepdad have not yet met my fiancé’s siblings, so there will already be some introductions going on.

But I feel like this is different because it’s 2 families meeting, not everyone meeting someone who’s NOT part of the family. I also think it’s unfair to my parents who are there to celebrate their daughter getting married. Not to watch my fiancé’s family get to know this new person.

They will be in town for a few days. I’d be 100% happy and willing to do another meal during that time to meet this guy. We could even do it the very next morning, we’re not busy. Bottom line is that I’ve no interest in meeting this person for the first time at my own wedding dinner. I want to tell the sister that he is not invited. AITA?

This is what people had to say to OP:

CSurvivor9 said:

He won't come. Let her know you're posting photos of everyone on facebook and he definitely won't come. Why cause problems saying no when you can say yes and set up a scenario where he'll say no?

FormSuccessful1122 said:

I’m assuming this post is all about the same man because I don’t understand “new bf” in your title based on this story.

NTA. But based on past history it doesn’t sound like he’d come anyway.

Artistic-Tough-7764 said:

NTA. "No, we are not planning for extra guests"

Life_Temperature2506 said:

She's been dating the guy "for a few years"? Easy YTA, right? No. He's had plenty of chances to meet everyone and chickened out, for whatever reason, every single time. Your future SIL has forfeited the right to have him at your wedding dinner. NTA

OP shared these edits to the post:

My fiancé agrees that it’s a weird request, but doesn’t care enough to say anything. But he’s very much a “go with the flow” kind of person so I don’t hold it against him. He’s not that close with his sister and disagrees with a lot of the decisions she makes in her life.

I said “new bf” because I’ve never met him, nor has most of the family. The “new bf” described in the title and the person discussed are the same person. Sorry for any confusion.