'AITA for telling my husband to not eat the food I made for my lunches?'
"AITA for telling my husband to not eat the food I made for my lunches?"
DroidFit3625 writes:
My husband (34M) and I (33F) had a little exchange yesterday morning. He works remotely full-time, while I work in person all five days of the week. I also do most of the cooking and cleaning. Since I’m not home during the day, I make my lunch ahead of time and make sure he either has leftovers or something fresh prepared for him the night before.
On Monday, there was a crisis at work, and I realized I was going to have to work longer hours this week and wouldn’t have much time to cook. I stayed up until 2 a.m. on Monday night cooking a variety of food to cover my lunches for the week and at least two to three days’ worth of meals for both of us.
He went to bed at 10 p.m. For my lunches, I made stuffed squash since I can just boil a little rice to go with it every night while packing my lunch. The next morning, as I was heading out for work, I started showing my husband what was in the fridge so he wouldn’t tell me later that he didn’t see something.
He saw the stuffed squash and started taking one out of the container before I could tell him I made it for my lunches. Here’s where I might be the A: as he was taking one out, I said a little too loudly, “No, that’s for my lunches.” He looked a bit like how our daughter looks when I scold her for something.
My intention was just to let him know I made it with a specific purpose so he wouldn’t eat all the portions I made for my lunches and leave me scrambling again. I also told him he was more than welcome to try one if he wanted to, I just didn’t want him to think he could have all of it. He didn’t say much, and I was running late, so I left for work.
When I got home, he seemed unusually quiet and distant. I asked him why he was acting weird, but he said he wasn’t and that nothing was wrong, so I dropped it. At the end of the night, he told me he didn’t like how I spoke to him that morning about the food and that he felt like I was trying to control how much he eats.
My husband is the sort of person who will eat half a pizza that was meant to be shared between three people just because he feels like it in the moment, without asking if there’s enough for everyone.
Don’t get me wrong, he’s generally very considerate, but he has some “cookie monster” moments. Even so, I’ve only ever commented on it if he’s being rude to guests by doing it or if he’s overeating something he needs to restrict for medical reasons. Considering how much food I made to make sure he has plenty to eat during the day, his comment seemed to come out of left field and was honestly quite hurtful.
Still, I apologized for my tone that morning and for making him feel bad, and I explained the reasoning and intention behind it. So, AITAH for telling him not to eat the food I made for my lunches? Is it reasonable for him to think I’m trying to control how much he eats based on that one comment?
Here's what people had to say to OP:
stellablue925 says:
My husband works from home and I’m in the office 5 days a week. He survives without me having to baby him and takes care of his own meals all by himself. NTA. Your husband is lazy. Stop catering to him.
CounselorWriter says:
Why isn't lazy husband making meals? He's at home all day while the OP isn't.
Salty_Sense_7662 says:
Why isn’t he the cook and meal prepper since he never has a commute? NTA.
zipitdirtbag says:
Embarrassing for him that he can't take care of his own meals while he's at home during the day. He's not a child. I choose to make my own work lunches and my husband chooses to buy lunch when at work instead. We split the cooking between us. Stop being taken advantage of. You deserve more.