'AITA for making a lunch and saying it was disgusting turns out he actually ate my lunch?'
"AITA: My husband made himself a frozen meal for lunch and complained it was disgusting and threw it away."
No_Sherbert_7460 writes:
So, every now and then, I buy a random frozen meal to keep on hand for lunch emergencies. I had one in the freezer for a month. A few weeks ago, my husband saw it and asked if that was his (because he can't remember anything he buys or adds to the grocery list). I said, "No, that's mine."
Fast forward to yesterday: I hear him nuking something in the kitchen, then he loudly declares it’s absolutely disgusting, tosses it down the sink, and starts whining about not having lunch. I hadn’t eaten that frozen meal and didn’t think I would need it this week, so I thought, Well, if I let him have it, he’ll have something to eat, and I’ll just grab another one next time I’m at the store. So, I offer him the meal I was saving.
He asks which one, and I say, "The white bean chicken chili." He goes, "That’s what I just threw away." Cue my rage. "Wait, you took my lunch without asking and then threw it away when you didn’t like it?"
He says, "You wouldn’t have liked it—it was completely different from chili." I’m like, "Yeah, I KNOW. It’s white bean chicken chili—it’s not supposed to be like regular chili. That’s why I bought it."
His response? "Well, it was disgusting." I say, "You didn’t even check what it was, didn’t remember it was mine, and when you didn’t like it, you threw it away instead of asking me about it." He goes, "But you offered it to me."
I reply, "Yeah, I offered it because I thought you had nothing else. But now that I know you just grabbed my meal without asking, didn’t even eat it, threw it out, and didn’t ask if I wanted it before wasting it, I’m a little pissed."
Then he got mad and started telling me I was setting him up, that no matter what he did, he was wrong, and I was being unreasonable. He told me to "pick a lane." I tried to explain why I was mad and said, "Imagine you heard me complaining about something I recently bought, and I decided I didn’t like it, so I just threw it away.
Then, you have this gift card you’ve been saving for yourself, and you say, ‘You know, I was saving this for myself, but since you already spent your money on something you didn’t like, you can have my gift card to buy something better.’ And I go, ‘Oh, well, thanks, but I already used your gift card to buy the thing I didn’t like and threw away. I saw it lying on the counter, so I just used it.’”
My question is, AITA for getting mad at him after I discovered he took my lunch and then threw it away, even though there was a brief moment where he appeared to have nothing to eat for lunch, so I offered him mine?
Here are the top rated comments.
MesoamericanMorrigan says:
NTA. I was infuriated on your behalf. He asked if it was his, you told him it was yours, he went and cooked it anyway, didn’t like it and was wasteful, not even bothering to offer it to you once he realized he obviously heated up something he wouldn’t have bought for himself.
Obse55ive says:
My husband takes care of the grocery shopping and does most of the cooking. He will deliberately say this is mine or this is yours. I've learned to ask if I can use cheese for example and he'll say yes or no it's being use for a meal this week.
He could've looked at the meal and would have immediately realized it was not his and he would not like it. When he realized he didn't like it, he could have left the rest of it for you. It's pretty clear which frozen meals are mine and my husband's and we physically keep them separated in the freezer.
Mrs_Crii says:
This really sounds like weaponized incompetence to me. Like he did this very much on purpose. Maybe I'm wrong but if I were you I'd take a close look at his behavior overall and see if this fits a theme with him. NTA.
HortenseDaigle says:
NTA and he gets bonus AH points for dumping food down a sink.