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'AITA for telling my mom I won't talk to her after she hid my college acceptance from me?'

'AITA for telling my mom I won't talk to her after she hid my college acceptance from me?'

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'I told my mom she's the worst thing that's ever happened to me.'

Immediate_Land_4171 writes:

Okay, so, I've had a lot of fights with my mom over the years. I'm 17, I'll be 18 soon, and for me, it's college time. I've been getting into fights with her about college since I was 14 (mainly her telling me I wasn't going and me telling her I was). It was never a financial thing, but she felt I didn't have the personality to go to college.

We keep having fights about this to this day. Apparently, a little while ago, I got into one of my dream universities. I had been dreaming about this university for years. And I got in on a scholarship (not full-ride, but I had a lot of tuition off), and with the amount I was awarded, I could have paid for college myself (housing was free).

She hid it from me. I lost access to my email for a while, so I was relying on using her account to check for responses. But for a while, she wouldn't let me check, and she just said I didn't get any responses yet, and I believed her.

The other day, she went to the washroom, and I got into her phone and I saw the email. I yelled more than I ever had, I swore at her for the first time in my life, and I told her I'd pay for college myself. I said she's the worst thing that ever happened to me and once I was gone, I would never speak to her again.

My mom isn't talking to me anymore. My dad is traveling. My sister is in college. I can't speak to anyone, but apparently, my mother spoke to her therapist and believes I inflicted trauma-creating words on her purely out of teenage angst.

I don't think it was angst; I genuinely can't express the anger I feel right now. But I do want to know if I gave my mom trauma. AITA?

Herer are some of the leading comments on the post:

KryoChamber says:

NTA (Not the A%@^ole) -I'm a mom myself. She purposefully hid an acceptance letter and lied when she was asked about it. She quite literally could've diminished your future success had you not found out about her weird need to keep it from you.

Also, i have LARGE doubts that she told the whole truth about that situation in order to garner some sympathy. In no way is it teenage angst. It was quite reasonable to be upset,frustrated, mad, etc. From the fact she blatantly LIED about your dream college.

Frankly, if this truly is your reason to cut off ties with your mother, then she can only blame herself for her deceit. Hope you do well in college!!!

Negative-Muffin-3650 says:

NTA. You seem to have handled the situation pretty maturely so far, and then she went and hid a life changing email from you. That is something no mother should ever dream of doing.

She has not suffered ‘trauma inflicting words’ because of you getting rightfully angry, I promise you that. I don’t know how she was expecting you to react, but you were understandably angry. She owes you a sincere apology. She needs to realise that you are very nearly an adult, and you make your own decisions.

StonewallBrigade21 says:

INFO: How did you lose access? Why would you use her email? Why didn't you at least create a new email? Either way, NTA. What your mom did was messed up. I wouldn't blame you for going off to college and going low contact with her.

OP responded:

The number I attached to my email was lost, and i forgot the password. i wanted to call around and ask but my mother said it would be easier to check through hers, as my email is set to be forwarded to hers.

Radiant-Chipmunk-987 says:

Your mother is acting maliciously and about 10 other things. Just wanted to ensure that you DO get your email, as this is only one of many coming. You may have actually missed some already. So, find someone to receive your mail—perhaps a friend, counselor, or the school, etc.

Also, on the day you turn 18, get your own bank account with a new password. Do not tell your mother. These are life-altering tasks, so please follow through. Could she email/call the colleges and create a real mess? I'm guessing she'll withdraw any financial support at some point—crazy parents generally do.

What do you think? Is OP right to threaten to cut contact off from her mom?

Sources: Reddit
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