My husband and I have been together for 5 years. My MIL has always been very into posting on Facebook (at least 1 post a day), she even used to post FOR my husband when he was a kid/teen. Very often, when we send her photos of ourselves, what we’re doing, or anything note worthy, they get posted on Facebook without our knowledge.
Sometimes I’ll go on Facebook and see photos I had no idea she had taken of us. She has around 2k followers but posts everything completely publicly anyways. It’s always made me uncomfortable but I never thought it was a problem before now. My husband and I have been busy with new jobs and haven’t been able to make the trip to see his parents together since the Holidays (he’s gone without me, but I have an odd work schedule).
Yesterday, I got a call from my parents asking if I had made the trip to see his family. Looking at Facebook, MIL had created an AI generated photo of us watching a football game with them, all in matching Jerseys. This bothered my husband too and he offered to text his mom and ask her not to create anymore AI photos of us.
I’ve always had a great relationship with MIL, and she’s always been very kind and understanding, so neither of us expected her to take that poorly. She did. She told us we were ungrateful for her, that we have always hurt her feelings when we ask for no pictures, and that we (and especially me) are too sensitive and should just let her post what she wants.
My husband is also uncomfortable with the way she is acting and draws the line at AI photos, but says we can deal with her normal posting habits. I thought I had a say before in what gets posted but now I’m uncomfortable with the whole situation. Am I the ahole if I start telling my MIL no to posting pictures of me? (Outside of family photos and reasonable things)
Poison-Hot-Chocolate said:
NTA. She has an addiction to the attention on facebook. Call her or meet up with her personally. No more photos sent to her. No more AI generated content. Is she doesn't comply, weaken contact so she faces consequences for her actions.
MissIncredulous said:
NTA. Ask her if she understands the concept of identity theft, consent, and spreading false information. Your privacy and identity are yours and yours alone, and this would be the hill I die on.
cydril said:
NTA and you can report the photos.
Positive-Hat-7839 said:
Your mother-in-law‘s manipulating your emotions to duck with your identity and identifiable characteristics. This can have implications with your personal information, privacy, financial security and, if she gets malicious, your personal and professional reputation. Imagine her AI-ing you at a raging keg party getting sloppy drunk in negligee or some such:
You are NTA. Your mother-in-law is absolutely crossing every kind of line that there is in terms of personal identity and privacy….. all for likes and clicks on Facebook. For all you know, she is monetizing you right now, or is planning to monetize the family. You’ve got to ensure she never gets pictures of your kids.
Pissed_With_A_Bnr said:
NTA. It's your pictures made public for the world to see. Unless you don't mind (which you do), she has no business posting you to her social media. AI makes it even worse.
cheekmo_52 said:
NTA. She has no business posting photos of anyone who is uncomfortable with it. Certainly not posting them publicly. She also has no business taking photos of others unknowingly…let alone manufacturing computer-generated images that don’t reflect reality.