'AITA for calling the cops on my neighbor for recording me? He says he's filming himself.'

AITA for calling the police on my creepy neighbor?

ThrowRAxylophone writes:

I’m a young woman living alone in a studio apartment with a courtyard view, so when I look out the window there’s another apartment complex. For a few months now, I’ve noticed this one male neighbor staring at me very often throughout the day and pulling out his phone to seemingly record/take pictures when I change or when I’m in my pajamas.

I now try to keep the blinds closed as often as possible, but I don’t have AC, and I really need to have the windows open as it gets really hot in here (they open inwards, so I can’t open the window if the blinds are down).

At first, I gave the guy the benefit of the doubt, but even some of my friends have this running joke of asking, “Can we come over or is that guy going to stare at us again?” Today again, I caught him staring, and I sort of shrugged to let him know I saw him staring. He shrugged as well and pulled out his phone to record/photograph me again until I pulled the blinds back down.

After asking my lawyer friend for advice, they told me to report it to the police as it could be considered harassment. I called the non-emergency line, they sent a policeman to get my report, and he went to give the guy a “warning.”

The same policeman later called me, saying that this was all a big misunderstanding, as the neighbor films a lot of videos for his social media and allegedly records himself in front of the window and not me. He also denied ever staring. Apparently, he had some friends over, and they all vouched for him and laughed it off.

On one hand, it’s not like he was going to admit to it if he was creeping. On the other hand, maybe he’s right, and I’m a crazy lady who called the cops on my neighbor for no good reason. Either way, I’m embarrassed, and I kind of never want to open my blinds ever again. AITA?

Here are the top comments:

Rarebird00 says:

The neighbor's and policeman's response both seem like they're minimizing your discomfort and insisting you're mistaken. Based on your description though, it seems like you have every right to feel uncomfortable. Having someone consistently watch you in your private space is definitely not okay. You're NTA.

I'd consider buying some kind of cloth you could put over the windows to maintain your privacy while still letting some breeze through. Or you could set up a space where you can safely change without being seen, possibly with a folding screen or something similar. I'm so sorry this is happening to you.

yitzike says:

The cop accepted the guy's explanation because it meant less police work. I don't buy the neighbor's explanations because he saw you shrugging and shrugged back. He was clearly watching you.

Unless the neighbor had a public social media persona, with lots of videos filmed at that spot (and he made those videos available publicly as proof) then I think his explanation was BS. NTA

ElectricalPick9813 says:

I completely appreciate you should be able to go about your day without being stared at, but one-way window film is inexpensive, needs no special skills to apply and can easily be removed without leaving any residue. You can see out, but no-one can see in. It would allow you to open the window for ventilation.

One-Drummer-7818 says

NTA- next time take a video of him doing this, and keep calling the police.

OP provided a small update:

I’ll be buying mirrored privacy film for my windows tonight. I’ll also add that when I mentioned me changing, it’s usually me having to wear a button-down on top of my usual tank top/t-shirt for a Zoom call, then taking it off after said meeting. I am by no means “parading around my apartment naked” with the windows open for fun.

What do you think?