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'My pregnant wife’s sister offered to sleep with me. How do I break the news to her?'

'My pregnant wife’s sister offered to sleep with me. How do I break the news to her?'


Telling someone you love that they've been betrayed is a horrific task, and there's no easy way to do it.

"My pregnant wife’s sister offered to sleep with me."

My wife (24f) and I (24m) have been together for 3 years and married for about six months now. We found out that we’re going to be parents and we are both very excited. We told our families over the weekend and everyone was happy for us.

This morning, I got a text from my wife’s sister (21f) saying that she knows that women can get emotionally and physically ab-sive and can put a stop to intimacy during pregnancy and that she is willing to “help” me out anytime s-xually or emotionally during and after the pregnancy.

Obviously, I have no interest in anyone other than my wife but how do I tell her what her sister offered? My wife has always been there for her sister and they have always been super close.

Her sister was the MOH at our wedding. I don’t want my wife to lose that bond and it would destroy her if she found out that her sister was willing to betray her like that. At the same time, her sister is a snake and is willing to ruin our marriage and the life of her soon-to-be-nephew/niece for what I’m guessing is a childish crush on me.

My first priority is my wife and unborn child and anyone else can go to hell. How do I approach this situation? There is literally no good outcome. I can tell my wife tonight. She will be absolutely devastated. I will always be there for her and I know her parents will be on her side but losing a 20-year bond with her own sibling while in such a vulnerable state sounds terrible.

How can I possibly tell my wife that the sister she loved and looked after for so many years, wanted to sleep with her husband while she was pregnant? If I don’t tell her soon and tell her later, she may lose her trust in me. If I don’t tell her at all, my wife will be close with someone who clearly does not care for her and could easily betray her again in the future.

People had a lot to say in the comments.

HumanJacket8971 wrote:

This is one of those things you MUST show your wife immediately. The longer you wait the worse it will make your wife will feel. It’s either a childish test by your wife or your SIL is just evil.

Adept_Ad_473 wrote:

NTA. This is a very simple solution OP. Rip the bandaid off, tell your wife. Your wife's sister betrayed you, your wife, your marriage, and her family the second she tried to inject that toxicity into your relationship.

This type of person is the same kind of manipulative excrement that will turn around and say she was testing your loyalty to her sister (your wife) if you give her any warning at all that you might tell your wife.

Don't give her any opportunity to manipulate, tell your wife the truth before she has a chance to twist facts and destroy your marriage. Your wife's devastation will pale in comparison to p-ssy-footing the situation in a way that calls your loyalty into question. Sister needs to be dealt with swiftly and decisively now. She did the FA part and now she needs to FO. Better now than later.

TBearForever wrote:

I would present it like...honey, I got a strange text from your sister's number and show it to her. I'm not sure who may have sent it, but I really hope it wasn't her, and if it was I really hope she was joking.

Frog-Snacks wrote:

Your duty as a husband is to tell your wife ASAP, even if she doesn't want to hear it. Otherwise you'll end up with an irreconcilable problem that you and your wife will struggle with and may even cost your relationship. Your wife is your partner treat her like one.

Your wife's sisters duty as a sister is to not fuck around with her husband, that's something they need to work out. Just remember, a child raised in a broken home has way less chance in life then a child raised in a stable one.

waterfallwishes wrote:

Absolutely do not respond to the text. Take the text to your wife and say, what in the world is your sister on, is she drinking? Is she joking this insane, and just show it to her. It's up to your wife to decide how to react to this. They are close. She knows her well.

And just support your wife in whatever she decides. You are her partner please trust me, this is the best course of action, she needs to know now. You two are a team. (Chance it could also be a 'test' by both of them.) Tell her now. Good luck!

TheLeadSearcher wrote:

NTA. Your relationship with your wife is the most important thing now, more than anything including her relationship with her sister. I'd let your wife know and tell her obviously you are not going to take up her sister's offer.

Smoke_Frog wrote:

Sounds like your wife is testing you via her sister, because it’s highly unlikely she would text you to cheat lol. In fact you might have already failed the test since you didn’t tell your wife right away and instead posted about it on Reddit. Rookie move my man.

financewonk wrote:

NTA. The best option is to take screenshots (make sure you have physical proof) and show them to your wife. You want to be honest. Let the sisters deal with each other. The other option is to firmly reject the sister in writing, keep all the screenshots (for proof later), and never mention it again.

That spares everyone's feelings for now, but it may blow up later if the sister tells. At least you'll have the proof saved. Overall, I would just go with option one, tell wife.

LionBig1760 wrote:

There's no rational human being on this planet that 1) would ever send that message to their brother in law, and 2) would get that message, sit on it, and then take it to reddit to see what socially maladjusted teens might think about the situation.

You're just plainly a dick for making s-t up and posting it to reddit. This has all the hallmarks of a fake reddit post, including the obvious not-concluded part that leaves an opportunity for you to write a follow-up creative piece that will certainly drive engagement with it's outlandish drama.

Sources: Reddit
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