'AITA for not wanting my sister in my life because she doesn't like that I'm a SAHD?'

"AITA for telling my mom I don't care if my kids never know my sister's kids?"

SelectionOne5946 writes:

I (31M) was never very close to my sister (33F). We got along okay as kids, but the older we got, the more different we became, and the more strain there was in our relationship. She married young (18) and has many kids now. I got married five years ago, and my wife and I have two children together.

My sister is a SAHM, a "trad wife," and a "submissive wife" to her husband. She believes men need to be the providers and women should stay at home without exception. She looks down on me for being a SAHD. She actually started mocking me when I married my wife. My wife makes more money than I did when I was working.

She was always the breadwinner. I still worked hard and brought money in, but she was a higher earner. My sister told me I wanted a husband, not a wife, with the way I was acting. When she heard I was going to be the SAHP, she expressed that she felt it was wrong. I ignored her and decreased our contact significantly.

Now, however, my sister is looking to take advantage of me being at home with my kids, and she wants me to take her kids sometimes. I said no. I told her she doesn't get to treat me like sh^t and then expect favors. She tried to dangle a relationship with her kids—something I never really had—over my head. She told our mom, and now Mom's involved.

She asked me why I wouldn't want to spend time with my sister's kids, and when she realized I knew what I was passing up, she mentioned my kids knowing their only cousins. Then she suggested I could be a positive influence on my sister's kids so they'd grow up being less judgmental. She said it would be better for all the kids—hers and mine.

I told my mom I do not care if my kids never know my sister's kids. I said, actually, it would be for the best, given how my sister and her husband think and act. I explained that their kids could talk like their parents around my kids, and unless I was with them all 24/7, I wouldn't know or be able to correct it.

I also said I am not taking on the responsibility of teaching them better than their parents are. I pointed out that this could even lead to more insults aimed at my wife and me.

I told her my sister would lose her mind about boys playing with dolls, playing house, or dressing up—and we have all that here. I said I am not exposing my family to that negativity. My mom told me it's very disappointing that I don't care about my own nieces and nephews. AITA?

Here are the top rated comments:

Turmeric_Ping says:

NTA. Every responsible parent takes care that their children aren't mixing with kids who might be a bad influence.

AquaSparkGeorgia says:

Your sister has been consistently disrespectful towards you, your wife, and your choices. You have no obligation to cater to her needs or provide free childcare after she's mocked and belittled you.

JuliaX1984 says:

NTA She's a trad wife SAHM - she's supposed to be taking care of her kids.

GrumpyLump91 says:

It's disappointing that your mom doesn't care about you and your family and only your sister and hers.

What do you think?