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'My wife only sends me Zillow postings out of our budget, other ones give her 'bad vibes.' UPDATED

'My wife only sends me Zillow postings out of our budget, other ones give her 'bad vibes.' UPDATED

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Landing housing in the current market is stressful enough on its own, but it's even worse when you're not seeing eye to eye with your partner.

In a popular post on the Mildly Infuriating subreddit, a man asked for advice on how to handle his wife's choice in house postings. He wrote:

"My wife only sends me Zillow postings out of our budget."

My wife and I are moving back home near my family so we could have support when we eventually have our own family. We wanted to buy and have a hard cap at 575k. For the last 3 months she had been sending me Zillow posting after Zillow posting of houses going for 725-800k.

I’ve mentioned our budget but she has yet to send a house at or below it. When I send her houses that do match our budget all of them give her “bad vibes.”

My mother has now started sending me Zillow postings (she’s very excited about us coming back.) The latest one being a 80 acre ranch for 1.4 million, her comment being something like “wouldn’t this just be great to raise a family on.” Yes mom…yes it would be. Probably unreasonable to feel frustrated by it but it’s got me feeling like I’m not earning enough to match expectations.

The internet had a lot of thoughts about this dynamic.

False-Corner547 wrote:

Funny, I always look up Zillow postings that are out of my budget. It's sort of my safe p*rn at work. I do understand though why it is frustrating for you in your situation.

OP responded:

I’ve done this too, very fun. The experience changed drastically now that I’m seriously looking lol.

catjuggler wrote:

Does your wife agree with the budget or did you decide it unilaterally?

OP responded:

We sat down together and I told her what I’d prefer, and what I’m comfortable with. We live off my earnings as all her salary goes to paying off her student loans. It was originally 525k but after discussing my it we squeezed our current spending and increased our budget to 575k.

CatLadyNoCats wrote:

Is it possible your wife doesn’t want to move?

OP responded:

She put in her notice at work on her own so I don’t think that’s the case. We talk about it often, All our friends are back home, I’ve never gotten the slightest vibe that this could be the case. We’re moving across country, she just told her work she’s leaving in a couple months. She has interviews lined up for the new location.

Similar-Lie-5439 wrote:

Half of 750k is better than 500k in the future divorce

OP wrote:

Damn bro I posted on mildly infuriating not AITAH 😂 tho I guess the assumption is fair with every Reddit story basically being “am I the AH for asking my wife to water our cactus in the morning” then three days later the updates comes out and the divorce is in full swing.

Three days later, OP jumped on with an update.

Thanks to everyone who chimed in. Some solid advice layered in there. I had posted that because I thought it was a perfect example of something that was mildly infuriating, and while I hadn’t talked to my wife about it yet I had intended to. Now some of y’all need to chill, or take a break from the internet.

People in the comments telling me my marriage is doomed and I had better just “walk away now”. Wild jump from something that is kinda annoying to me “she’s a lost cause abandon ship.” I suppose I understand it a bit though.

The last several stories I’ve read from Am I the AH were basically “Am I wrong to ask my wife to pick up after herself?” Followed by an update that she’s been cheating for years with the neighbors dog or some s**t.

So I talked to my wife, and told her how I felt about seeing nothing but out of budget houses being sent to me and this crazy thing happened. She apologized. Said she was just sending me houses she liked but knew we couldn’t get because for her it was fun to look at things we could work towards.

I wasn’t aware how much it was eating at me. We decided to rent for another year until we know for a fact she lands a decent job in the new area and is solidified in it. To the permanently on-liners. My apologies if this end to the story was anticlimactic and didn’t feed your insatiable desire for chaos. My marriage is fine, we just occasionally irritate each other.

TL:DR- My wife apologized and we will rent for another year till better settled in the area. Seek therapy 🍻

The internet had a lot to say in response to the spirited update.

7grendel wrote:

Glad to hear it! Always love a communication win! My dad was is a realtor, so I get looking at listings just for fun. Never considered it would create stress in a partner but it really makes sense.

DiscipleofMurphy wrote:

My wife sends me multi-million dollar ranches in other states nowhere near anywhere I could reasonably expect to find a job in my line of work, randomly and for no reason.

Guess I need to just break it off now, huh?

OP responded:

Sounds like it was doomed from the start. Only thing to do now is download the latest Rollo Tomassi video.

CeciTigre wrote:

You did the right thing, you told your best friend, wife and partner in life how she and your mother were making you feel. Problem fixed. You have a great wife and marriage. Best wishes :)

ToastetteEgg wrote:

Great news! And a large portion of people on Reddit advise going scorched earth with any and all relationships for the slightest inconvenience.

OP responded:

Your spouse inconvenienced you? 🚩🚩🚩 drop ‘em, I’d never stay married to someone that toxic.

KyleCAV wrote:

"So I talked to my wife, and told her how I felt about seeing nothing but out of budget houses being sent to me and this crazy thing happened. She apologized. Said she was just sending me houses she liked but knew we couldn’t get because for her it was fun to look at things we could work towards. Wasn’t aware how much it was eating at me." Crazy how talking to your SO solves things, right.

In a rare stroke for the internet, it sounds like this was settled pretty easily.

Sources: Reddit
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