Bride refuses to accommodate sister's new diet at the wedding. 'She deserves a full menu.' AITA?
"AITA for not accommodating my sister's new dietary preferences at my wedding?"
My (28F) wedding is coming up in three months, and my fiancé (30M) and I have been planning it for over a year. We’ve carefully chosen a menu that features dishes we both love. Recently, my sister (26F) went vegan and is now insisting that we provide a separate vegan menu for her and her boyfriend (27M).
The problem is that we’ve already finalized the catering, and making changes at this point would be both complicated and expensive. We do have some vegan options available, but my sister insists that it’s not enough and that she deserves a full menu tailored to her dietary needs. I offered to make sure the vegan options we have are plentiful and to provide a vegan-friendly dessert, but she’s still unhappy.
To add to this, my sister has always been a bit demanding and tends to make everything about her. She even threatened not to come to the wedding if we don’t accommodate her request.
This has put a lot of stress on me and my fiancé, who just want our special day to go smoothly. AITA for refusing to change the menu for my sister? Should I be more accommodating even though it’s our wedding and we’re already stretched thin with the budget?
Here's what top commenters had to say about this one:
Amazing_Reality2980 said:
NTA. "We do have some vegan options available". You're sister's just being an entitled pain in the a$s. Her behavior right now is what gives vegans a bad reputation. Tell her the wedding menu is set and can't be changed now. The wedding and reception are just for a few hours.
Tell her to eat before she comes, and then she'll just have to make do with the vegan options that are available. I promise she won't pass away from starvation in those few hours. And tell her it's your day and she needs to stop trying to make it about herself. She's creating unnecessary drama and stress for you for no reason.
Electronic_World_894 said:
NTA. She doesn’t get a full vegan menu. That’s not how it works. A considerate host will offer a vegan choice. But not a full menu. Maybe this is rage bait. But if she’s actually this entitled, I think you need therapy to grow a backbone and stand up to her without guilt.
Spirited-Pipe-2479 said:
NTA. The catering has been finalized. That’s all there is to it. She has options, so unless she wants to pay to have her own vegan menu for herself and her boyfriend then leave everything as is.
Commercial_Yellow344 said:
NTA. No dietary restrictions need a full menu at someone else’s wedding and expense. Personally I would tell her take it or leave it the way you have it now!
PandaMime_421 said:
NTA and if your description is accurate I would not make any special accommodation for her, period. She's being entitled, and in my book that gets you exactly nothing.
I would tell her there are vegan options available. If she isn't happy with those she certainly doesn't have to eat anything. If she claims she must have a special menu catering specifically to her to be able to attend I'd tell her she's not obligated to attend.
FWIW, my partner is vegan and I tend to be sensitive to issues relating to lack of vegan options, etc. In this case, though, your sister is just trying to make your wedding about her.
spaceylaceygirl said:
NTA- I'm vegan and I would be glad just to have some vegan options available. The same way i would expect omnivores to go one meal meatless i would expect a vegan to go one meal without multiple choices. She can eat prior to the wedding or bring a small cooler with some sandwiches and cookies to leave in the car to eat later. I've done this and enjoyed my little mini picnic!
BlueGreen_1956 said:
NTA. Tell her you will not be changing the menu and that you will miss her if she doesn't come. THEN, do not engage with her anymore.