'AITA for not getting an ice cream machine with my GF? She always overhypes new toys.' UPDATED

"AITA for not getting an ice cream machine with my GF?"

This is a small issue, but I still wanted to get some opinions. My gf who I'll call Sam and I have been dating for a few years now. We live together, and when we decide to buy an item for the house, we share the expenses on said item 50/50.

Recently, a friend of ours has bought a new ice cream machine, and ever since seeing it, Sam has been asking to get one of our own, while I have been against buying one. First of all, we don't eat ice cream that often, even without the machine; in fact, I know that there is a cup full of ice cream in the freezer right now that has been sitting there unopened for quite some time now.

That is not the only reason, however, when Sam sees something like this ice cream machine, she always hypes up how she would use it all the time and how this machine could change our lives, etc., but after the initial hype fades, she never looks at it again.

The same thing happened when she wanted a new fancy coffee machine, an air fryer, a bread machine, and the list goes on. She convinces me that they would be good to have around, only for them to never be used again.

I told her this, and she promised that this time would be different, but that was also what she said about the coffee machine. We are doing very well financially, and the thing costs, when converted to USD, around $500, which we can definitely afford, but then again, if no one will use it in the end, what's the point? So, AITA for not contributing to buying the machine?

The commenters had a lot to say in response.

CharlotteSays02 wrote:

NTA - if Sam wants to buy an ice cream machine that she won’t use, then she 100% can but leaning into consumerism just because a friend has one doesn’t seem like the best option. Maybe suggest to her that the money could be better spent on something you’d both like, but if she’s dead set on buying one then she can absolutely do that with her own money!

OP responded:

I don't think I've said this, but I have already told her that if she wanted it that much, she didn't need my permission to buy it. However, she still really wants me to contribute to buying this machine, like she pouts about it when I tell her that I wouldn't be contributing.

I think she wants me to contribute because it's too big a commitment, and if she doesn't use it like I told her would happen, she has spent $500 while taking all the blame of spending the money onto herself, if I contribute, now, I have also approved this item and so we share the blame when it doesn't get used.

Waste_Worker6122 wrote:

Your agreement is you split home purchases 50/50. You aren't willing to waste your money on 50% of an ice-cream machine. If she wants one that bad and you two are that well off financially she can pay for it 100% herself and remember to take it with her if/when you break-up. I don't see where Sam is being an AH about this though so NAH.

CaPalmer1 wrote:

NTA. My ADHD husband is a bit of a gadget fan: sometimes they become something really integral to our lives, sometimes they don’t. My solution/compromise is he can get one cheap (basic model, second hand, borrow from a friend etc) to try it out.

After a while, we review and decide: if it’s brilliant we buy a good one and clear the space for using it, if it’s ok we keep/source a basic one, or if we aren’t using it, or it’s not as good as he thought it might be.

What helped is having a small kitchen and having limited space for gadgets, so sometimes to make room for something new, he has to choose something old to get rid of. That helps with the ‘is it worth it’ decision.

jillian512 wrote:

Tell her to look at some ice cream recipes and ingredients. Anytime I consider making homemade ice cream, I realize how much it's going to cost. It's cheaper to just buy ice cream. That doesn't change, regardless of the machine you use to make it. If she still wants one, let her buy it with her own money. NTA.

Nine days later, OP shared an update.

F the ice cream machine, no one cares about the ice cream machine. The air fryer, on the other hand, is absolutely a game changer. The first few times I've used it, everything came out undercooked because I was a dumbass and didn't know how to use the machine. Now that I've put my bigotry aside, I finally get it.

The kitchen is not scorching hot, the potatoes are to die for, and the chicken is delicious. Thank you to everyone who convinced me to give this machine another try. Also, I've made my first batch of bread, and it most definitely tastes like bread, so I must have done something right.

As for the ice cream machine, I bought Sam a less expensive model for now, and we'll see if we actually use it. It's been great for now, but it's still too early to tell. Literally no one asked for an update, but since the air fryer was your guys' suggestion, I thought I owed all of you a thank you.

The comments kept coming.

WoodenEggplant4624 wrote:

I don't have an air fryer, don't want one. I don't have bread maker, tried one and was not impressed.

The gin and lemon curd ice cream I made yesterday is wonderful though. Gelato Chef 2000 is do easy to use.

Learned_Hand_01 wrote:

I use the air fryer so much now that when my oven broke, I didn’t even notice it for a long time, and when the oven took more than a week to replace it was a problem only once. And I cook basically everything we eat, we get restaurant food less than once a week. It uses less power and heats the kitchen less while usually doing a better job. The only real constraint is capacity.

Ramo2653 wrote:

So I read the original post and as someone that bought a fancy ice cream machine in 2020, I do use it, but like 6-10 times a year max. Still works for me overall but I can see not going that route.

HoneyBunnyBalou wrote:

Thanks for the update! Pleased to hear you're using the air fryer, I don't have room in my kitchen 😞 but my mum has one and a bread maker - she uses them both regularly and, in the winter, a soup maker. I get having a coffee maker but, of all the kitchen gadgets, an ice-cream maker is one I would never need, despite how how much I love ice-cream and no matter how big my kitchen is!!!!