'AITA for Not Inviting My Sister to My Wedding After She Tried to Steal My Fiancé?'
"AITA for Not Inviting My Sister to My Wedding After She Tried to Steal My Fiancé?"
Hungry-Breakfast988
So, here’s the deal. I (28F) have been with my fiancé (30M) for about three years, and we’re finally getting married next month. We’re super excited! But here’s where things get messy.
My sister (26F) has always been a bit of a drama queen. She’s had a string of failed relationships and is currently single, which she never fails to remind everyone about. About six months ago, she started acting weird around my fiancé.
I brushed it off at first, thinking it was just her being her usual self. But then one night, she texted him saying how “great” he looked and how she missed hanging out with him. I was uncomfortable, but I decided to let it slide.
Fast forward a few weeks: I found out from a mutual friend that my sister had been trying to flirt with my fiancé behind my back. When I confronted her, she laughed it off, saying she was just “joking.” I was furious. It felt like a huge betrayal, and I told her that I couldn’t trust her anymore.
Despite the fallout, I still tried to keep things civil for family gatherings, but my sister continued to make snide comments about how she could “make him happier” than I could. So, I made the decision to not invite her to my wedding. I thought it was for the best, considering the situation.
Now, my family is divided. Some say I’m overreacting, while others agree that she crossed a line. My mom is especially upset and says I should just forgive her for the sake of family.
I’m feeling guilty but also angry that my sister would act that way toward me. So, AITA for not inviting my sister to my wedding? Am I being too harsh for wanting to protect my relationship?
Here were the top rated comments from readers in response to the OP's post:
Ok_Young1709
Nta. Uninvite the ones who think she is right and tell them to keep an eye on their husband's once she tries to steal them. She has no boundaries clearly.
Trixie_shine
Honestly, I don’t think you’re the AH at all. Your sister crossed a major line trying to flirt with your fiancé, and it’s totally valid to want to protect your relationship. Weddings are supposed to be about love and trust, and it sounds like your sister doesn’t respect that.
Family or not, you have to prioritize your happiness and peace of mind. Your fiancé deserves better than to be caught in the middle of that drama. Stick to your guns—wishing you all the best on your big day!
Hungry-Breakfast988 (OP)
For real, I appreciate it! It’s been rough dealing with all this, and it’s good to know I’m not overreacting. Just wanna enjoy the big day without the drama, you know.
Cut_Lanky
I'm curious what your fiance's take is on all this? NTA, whatever his take is, I'm just curious. But indeed, turn the tables on your mom- pick a person who, for whatever reason, might hypothetically trigger insecurity in your mom in regards to your dad.
Tell your mom to remember her time planning her own wedding. Paint the picture graphically, that this person is repeatedly and unapologetically going hard in the paint trying to convince your dad to leave your mom for her, because she obviously can make him happier than your mom could.
Really drive it home, use the exact phrasing your sister has used, describe it happening in full view, she's shameless, not even trying to be sneaky. She's indignant when your mom confronts her, doubling down instead of apologizing, and relentlessly continues trying to bang your dad.
And everyone tells your mom that SHE needs to make the compromise, that SHE shouldn't feel upset about it, and no one seems to see ANYTHING wrong with this attempted home wrecker, just your mom's feelings about said home wrecker.
Now, instead of asking how that would make her feel (since we all already know), TELL her that if she won't admit that she'd be just as reluctant as you are to invite that home wrecker with a taste for dad to the wedding, it shows how little respect she has for you.
It's not like you're asking her to disown your sister, just asking her to treat you with basic dignity by NOT dismissing your completely valid feelings over a serious betrayal on your sister's part.
RazzmatazzOk9463
INFO: what was your fiancés reaction to her flirting? But absolutely NTA. She would probably pull some bullshit stunt during the objections part of the vows and just be a general asshole at the reception, similar to what she is doing now.
Animallover1970
NTA. But why did you have to find out from a mutual friend she tried to flirt with you SO, and not from him??? What does your SO say about inviting your sister or not? Or is it just your wedding and not his?
Apprehensive_War9612
NTA Ask mom exactly how far should you go for “the sake of family?” Is letting her fuck your husband far enough?
Gohighsweetcherry
Chances are if she’s been this blatant about it this far she’ll say or do something at the wedding. Shes jealous enough to rain on your parade. Make sure security at the door know her face and don’t let her in. Tell your mother she is deluded if she thinks your sister won’t do something to ruin your day. NTA.
SomeGuyInTheUK
NTA. The only one to care about is your fiance. If hes not 100% behind you then big problem but i presume he'd rather have it this way too? Who knows what devious shit she'd try to stir up at the weding, aside that fact you would have no reason to want to ever interact with her again.